I searched the meaning of “PAMELA” in the Google, and I am fortunate to have the results. I will use not the Google’s definition but my own description because I believe that I know myself better than the internet. I made my own meanings by starting in each letter of my name. It includes my personality, attitude, and perceptions not only in Steemit but in life as well.

I am P-A-M-E-L-A.

P - aying my attention to people who care for me rather than stressing myself to those judgmental eyes.

I can’t force everyone to like me. No matter how good I am to them, there is always someone that will say bad things behind my back. I have been there many times and they keep on questioning my decisions in life. Telling me things like, “What happened to the Accountancy Graduate?”, “Online job? Is that a decent job?”, or just simply “You are a lazy woman”. I get hurt of how cheap I am for them but I realized that I was not cheap at all, they just don’t see what lies beneath the whole iceberg.

I learned to ignore them and proceed to more important things. I have no regrets about where I am today, this is what I want. I am earning enough to support myself and my family as well, I have the freedom to do things that I like, and I am no one’s puppet. I may not be employed in a prestigious company, but I am an independent woman that knows how to survive in tough situations, I am a survivor.

A - ccepting that I am not perfect and swallowing my pride will not kill me.

I am only a human that is susceptible to make mistakes and there is always room for improvements. Writing is my passion but I admit to myself that I am not smooth when it comes to technical issues such as grammars and wider vocabularies. There are criticisms that may sound rude but deep inside, I am very happy to know all of my errors. I need a mirror to find out if there’s anything wrong in my face, same as in writing, criticisms are helpful to show me things that I need to enhance.

Believing in myself is good but believing ONLY in myself is dangerous. It is like traveling in the unfamiliar place without using a map, I will get lost. There’s nothing wrong to feel proud but too much dosage of it is poisonous. My success in Steemit is from the generosity of everybody. I am nothing without your help and guidance. Thank you so much for joining me on my long journey.

M - aking myself optimistic most of the time and never lose my hope.

I guess the hardest part in Steemit is when only a few are noticing me. I came to the point wherein I cried because I felt that nobody was interested in my writings. I get tired in Steemit and there are days that I haven’t posted anything. I am depressed whenever I see that my sleepless nights in finishing a blog is not worth it. I want to quit thinking that I don’t belong here. I even think that writing isn’t for me and maybe I’m just trying hard to make myself a writer. I felt that I was useless and a loser.

The word “loser” keeps on screaming in my head as if I’m going crazy so I decided to pursue my Steemit career. I want that screaming stop by trying again. It was a never easy struggle and I know that I can’t do it on my own. I am so glad that I found thoughtful friends on this platform. I learned new lessons from them, not only vocabularies but life lessons as well which matters the most.

E - mbracing my problems while looking at the brighter side.

Both of my parents are sickly specially my father so he can’t drive every day (it’s his job) so I have to help them. Whenever my father can’t drive due to his health condition, I am the one responsible for giving my two siblings their school allowances. I also have other things to worry that are making me sad, scared and feel weak. Each month I have tons of bills to pay such as electric and water bill, Philhealth and SSS, giving my grandma her allowance (all of her children is giving her, I’m doing it in behalf of my father), my parents’ medicines and groceries. I also need to have savings for emergency use.

My skills in accounting are helping me to budget properly. I always think for a solution before a serious problem arrives. Instead of crying and giving up, I make sure that I have the cash needed before the due date comes. I know when to spend more and when to cut down my expenses to avoid borrowing money. I believed that problems will always be a part of us and we have our brains to think and conquer it.

L - istening to the blogs of my fellow Steemians is fun and exciting.

You might be wondering why did I choose the word “listening” instead of “reading”. The reason is whenever I read someone’s masterpiece, it feels like I’m also listening to their voice. It is the product of their limitless ideas and creative thoughts. I can also relate to the amount of effort that they included just to make it appealing to the readers. They spend many hours in brainstorming and proofreading to make the best out of it. Their patience and hard work deserve the highest respect.

The differences of each Steemians is something that I like. There are artists, writers, programmers, crypto enthusiasts, photographers, bloggers, and travelers. My feed is never boring because of these amazing people. I’m seeing many things for the first times, things that I don’t even know it exists. Steemit is like our personal diary that is open for everyone to experience and enjoy.

A - llowing myself to get hit by the storm until the sun smiles back.

I understand that every day is a risk and there is no assurance if I get good upvotes. I learned that these upvotes don’t define who I am. Getting low ratings don’t mean that I am a useless person or getting high ones don’t mean that I am superior to the others. My writings are the reflection of every little piece that my mind thinks and my heart desires. If I do my best and my motives are genuine, God will surely bless it. I must believe in Him, in myself and to my trusted loved ones.

To all the newbies like me who are thinking about quitting, please continue your journey. If I give up easily before, I will never have the chance to write all of these and my Steemit name will be forgotten forever. If you feel tired and depressed, you can always take a rest but NEVER QUIT. Steemit is not only where we can put into words the things that we want, it is also a place where we can find new friends to love and cherish.

Again, I am PAMELA and it is an honor to be one of the Steemians.

More power to all of us!