Who is often emotionally abusive to children?
In addition to bullying verbally in school, children can get emotional violence from their parents. What often does this is the narcissistic parent type, who always wants to be close to him, and always depend on him.
Narcissistic parents have an obsessive, possessive and manipulative character. She does everything she can to keep the child independent, so she always depends on the parents.Parents also often impose their personal obsessions or dreams on children, forcing children to behave and look at their desires. So the child has no freedom to decide what he likes and what he dislikes.
Types of emotional abuse done by parents
Emotional violence can adversely affect the child's mental development, so it is better to avoid. Referring to The Minds Journal, here are 6 types of emotional violence that are often done by parents:
1. Rejection
Narcissistic parents who show behavior to the child, not consciously or unconsciously children feel undesirable. Worse yet, not only in one way but with a variety of ways.
Being degrading a child, or ignoring her needs is one of the kinds of emotional violence that can happen. Another example, send the child away, or worse, ask him to leave.
Call him by inappropriate names, say it is useless, make the child a scapegoat, or blame him for problems that occur with his brother or family problems. All of this is a very painful violence for children.
Refusing to talk or hug a young child as he grows, can also be categorized as violence. Here are the things that can be bad for the child's mental development.
- Critics are given continuously
- Calling with a bad name
- Telling the boy he is ugly
- Barking or cursing the child
- Constantly degrading the child, like calling him a fool or an idiot
- Degrading treatment
- Say words that embarrass children in front of others
- Tease the child about his physical appearance or his weight
- Express the regret that the child is not born with a different gender
- Refuse to embrace or show affectionate attitude
- Deliberately abandoned children at home, or in the middle of the crowd
- Do not include children in family activities
- Treat an older child (adolescent or young adult) like a child
- Ostracize children from family
- Not allowing children to make their own decisions that make sense
2. Ignoring children/parents is indifferent
Adults who have problems with emotional fulfillment are often unable to respond to the child's emotional needs. They can not show good attachment or provide positive parenting.
They will show no interest in the child, or restrain their affection. Or even fail to recognize the presence of their own children.
Often, parents are only present in a physical way, but emotionally they are not there. They can not respond or interact with the child, continuously. This is a violation of the child's emotional and psychological.
The following is an example of abandonment behavior toward children:
- Does not respond to the spontaneous behavior of toddlers while in social activities
- Not showing attention to important moments in a child's life
- Do not care about children's school activities, friends, and others
- Refuse to talk about children's activities and also things that interest children
- Plan a vacation or other activities without including children
- Do not accept children as offspring
- It does not provide the child's health care such as dental care and so on.
- Do not involve yourself in child's daily life
- Failure to protect the child
Ignoring a child and refusing to engage in his daily life is one form of emotional violence
3. Make the child a fear / give terror to the child
Parents who use threats, screams, or say harsh words such as cursing or profanity, all of which will have a seriously damaging effect on the child's psychology.
Threatening, criticizing, punishing children just because children show normal emotions, is an unacceptable act of violence. Although issued in the form of a joke, can make children fearful and intimidated. This is the worst emotional violence.
Those who witness or hear violence in a house, but do nothing, may also be considered as perpetrators.
Among the terror that can make children fear and fear are below:
- Teasing children in excess
- Shouting, yelling, taking out cursing or scaring
- Unexpected and exaggerated responses to the child's behavior
- Extreme verbal threats, such as going to throw a child, threaten to destroy a child's favorite objects, threatening to kill his beloved pet, threatening to evict children from home
- Angry tantrums alternated with warmth
- Hate the family member in front of the child, or the child can hear it from another room
- Forcing children to watch inhumane impressions
- Make inconsistent demands on the child
- Appearing emotions that change in front of the child
- Shame the child in public
A telephone survey in 1995 stated that when the child reaches 2 years of age, 90% of families have used one or two forms of psychological attacks in the past 12 months.
4. Alienate the child
Parents who perpetrate violence by way of exile, children will not be allowed to engage in any activity with peers. Locking a baby in a room, not giving him any stimulus that can help his growth.
Prevent adolescents to participate in extracurricular activities. Require the child to stay in the room from school until the next day, limiting his food intake. Or force the child into seclusion by keeping her friends and family away.
Things like this can be very damaging and are perceived as emotional violence, depending on the situation and severity.
The following behaviors and attitudes belong to the category of exile, which becomes emotional violence against children.
- Leave the child alone for long periods
- Keep children away from family
- Not allowing children to have friends, or interacting with other children
- Ensure that children have different attitudes and appearances from their peers
- Demanding to learn or perform tasks in excess
- Prevent children from participating in outdoor activities
- Punish the child because he/she follows social activities with friends
5. Influence on children
Parents who adversely affect children by showing them bad behaviors such as consuming alcohol, drugs, bad attitudes toward animals, exhibiting inappropriate sexual content, or engaging in criminal acts such as stealing, assault, gambling, and so on.
Encouraging minors to do forbidden things is violence, and should be reported to the police. Here are the bad influences of parents who are categorized as emotional violence.
- Praises or rewards when a child does bullying or behavior * harasses others, steals, or lies. Also when children * engage in sexual or violent activities
- Teach children to be racist, ethnic and fanatic bias against tribe or religion itself
- Encouraging children to be rude while doing sports activities with friends
- Giving children drugs, alcohol and other illegal goods
6. Exploitation
Child exploitation may take the form of manipulation or forced activity, irrespective of the child's need to develop. For example, asking an 8-year-old child to take charge of preparing a family dinner is not worth doing.
Give the child a responsibility beyond his or her ability or age, or use the child to make a profit. This is called violence. Here is a form of exploitation.
- Expecting small children and toddlers not to cry is wrong
- Anger when a toddler can not develop according to age including emotional violence
- Demand a child to take care of his younger brother, or even take care of his parents
- Blame the child for his brother's misbehavior
- Give unreasonable responsibility to the child
- Expect the child to be the backbone of the family
- Supporting children to participate in pornography
- sexually abused children or adolescents
That's the six kinds of emotional abuse done to the child, if you have unconsciously done so, stop immediately. When you see a neighbor or a nearby person doing so, report it.
Children are entitled to grow up feeling free, independent, and feel loved. If he has been emotionally and physically assaulted early on, his mental development will be disrupted, and he can become a bad person in the future.
Let's stop child abuse in any way.
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