I agree with you both are to blame, but fathers are responsible for us as men, and I feel that they are to hold accountable. As you said it "It's really not Mum's fault though, I mean she only knew how to teach me to be a woman because she is one."
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Yup. Mum still made the choice to stay with Dad though, even though she knew she had many warning signs. I just can't see blame as a healthy thing! Not in my opinion, anyway :)
Once you have your book it'd be an interesting read, I'm always up for being proved wrong :)
The study I write will be in Serbian, but I'll translate it as a summary, and post it as soon as I publish it.