Hi there! How is it going?
So yesterday @anjkara wrote a post very interesting. I strongly recommend checking "How to avoid conversation. Introvert tips. Co-workers. Level 2." A really nice one!
Some of you know me. I really love to meet new people and talk with everybody. So when I find someone very closed and introvert for me it's kind of a problem. Because I need to moderate my personality.
In today's post, I will share with you how to conquer an introvert person.
The Plump Cheeks Girl
Everything that I will say is just my opinion. If you are an introvert person, please share with me what you think about this post and help me to understand you species eheh
So the @anjkara post remembers how I conquered my ex-girlfriend. She is a true introvert person. Like the most introvert people, she is very intelligent. She knows about art, economic, travels, etc. Usually, we had great talks about everything. But In the beginning, I had some issues to understand her.
So what I did
The most important thing to an introvert person is "feel at home". The problem is. What meaning this? Can be a lot of things. For me, this means talk to a butch of new people every day share some jokes, etc. But not for an introvert.
So how to make an introvert person feel home:
1.Ask to join you for things that do not require talking.
Usually, they don't like to talk very much. Must of all if you are starting to know each other. You need to start using the "baby steps move". Some good example of what to do:
- Invite to watch a movie;
- Invite to play a game;
- Invite to art exposition;
Some of them will love to be a part of it and will start trusting in you.
2.NEVER, try to make fun of them, especially in front of someone else.
If you do it, well... Nice to meet you. You are a dead person. They will close all the doors you already opened. And to solve this crap it's something really difficult to do it.
Never forget. They are shy people. Doing something like making fun of them is one of the worst things you can do.
3. Appreciate What she/he does.
The introvert people are very interesting. Many introverts do a lot of cool stuff. The Plump Cheeks Girl, my ex. love art and sometimes she told me GREAT stories about painters and his masterpieces.
Usually, they value small gestures. Like if you know or not how they take coffee. What mug they use. This type of things.
4. Give seeds
Sometimes they run out of topic to talk. In this occasions, you have 2 options.
- Don't say anything and let it flow;
- Give then "Seeds";
They are educated, people. They have a lot of dreams! You just need to know how to give than right Seed at the right moment. Use something that you know he/she loves.
Just a note. Don't force the talk. If you feel that the conversation doesn't flow it's ok. Try later eheh
To end this post I will share with you a story. I don't know if I should but... Whatever.
Time to an embarrassing story
I have a friend, cool guy. He knows how to hack a lot of things. One time he hacks my phone (with my permission) to show me how it is done. After this, we played Uncharted 3 for PS3. A great game by the way.
Well at the night. I was already at home when I diced watch some "cool videos" (if you know what I mean) in a famous website coincidentally rhymes with Dtube and Youtube. Well, you get the point.
I start to watch the video and in the first 6 sec I receive a message saying something like this:
"Hi, Rui! Nice one! she has a great ass. But I prefer this one (and send me a URL for another video)"
Like you can see. The introvert people are very interesting. Sometimes they know cool stuff. eheh
Conclusion
Never give up on an introvert person. They know a lot of thinks and they can be best friends you can get. They really value then relations. Be careful to not break the trust. If you do something like this will be very hard to recover the relation.
I hope you enjoy. Let me know what you think about my perspective about Introvert people.
@anjkara what do you think? This can work?
See You Later!
Hey! You have a good observation about Introvert People. From how you wrote about it, you are not.
I used to be an introvert kind of person, so shy, reserve, quit, that's how people described me. But being an introvert does't mean that we are snub. It's just that we don't know how to start a conversation. We are full of fear that we might be rejected. Rejection is the most painful thing for us, and to avoid this we choose to be silent and alone.
Indeed, I'm not.
I believe. I have a big respect for Introvert people. I respect your effort to understand how to talk with other people. I really appreciate that.
If you have interest in the topic "how to start a conversation" you can check this one: https://steemit.com/life/@ddua/how-to-start-a-conversation-with-anyone
But let me try to understand better your situation. You choose to be silent and alone. But do you like it? I'm not judging you! I'm really want to understand better this situation! :)
Hey, I said I used to. That means I already conquered those fears. Did I like it? Yeah, sometimes I wanted to go back to that old me.
You are right. I didn't realize that.
Interesting. Why do you want sometimes "go back to that old me". What do you miss? :)
The solitude man, the I, me and myself time, the books. I can hardly have that now with growing kids, demanding work and a not-so-young budding business.
Owh, you are a mother. I get it! My father says the same thing eheh
My father always says: Son, do all the things you want. Because when you are a father your life never will be the same.
But hey, my father also says:
So let's do it!!! :)
I am a mother.
Lots of good points. Just to add to #1 about stuff to do, a lot of times introverts will not just invite themselves into an activity. You can tell if they do want to join by asking, and usually if they do, they'll jump on opportunity. If they don't, you'll notice hesitation. Sometimes even hesitation to say no to avoid awkward situation. It's always nice to give them an out if you notice hesitation, like "if you want to". This will also help gain trust and will show that saying no will not be awkward. Less uncomfortable moments = more likeliness of saying yes to stuff.
Great tips paperball!! I forgot this part. It's very important to give space for a "No thanks. Maybe tomorow". Reaaly nice one!
Tomorow I will add your comment on the post and I will tag you in this part!
@originalworks
Nice article. Introverts are indeed intelligent, and an extrovert like you can take some of the focus off of their self conscious stance
Indeed. I have a lot to learn. I will get it.
Can you share some advice to help me do it? :)
Just be entertaining
Thanks for the tips. I will! :)
Hahah this is a great response @ddua :D
I laughed reading this, really enjoyed it – playful and thought provoking. Great tips. I like the idea:
Good technique. Conversation can then flow naturally from whatever activity you're doing – rather than forced at gunpoint over a meal or drinks.
Mwahaha – your hacker friend is hilarious too lol.
Oh, and thanks for the shout out.
Anj x
Thank you so much! I really appreciate your feedback.
I started dating her using that "techinique" eheh
I remember asking her: Do you want the new Mad Max?
I was so nervous ahahah
You are totally right! We just need to be patient :)
Yah, he is a cool guy eheh