One day when I was staying at a small temple for couple of days in South Korea, I remember weeping and crying relentlessly and one monk came up to me and said,
"how rude to show your attachment towrads an earthly matter."
then I remember saying to him "go away! I am weeping because I want to!".
He had a smile on his face saying;
"well now you know how it feels like to be human. What it is like listening to your heart". I still didn't understand fully and in this case, it was a major contributing factor to lead me to travel alone with least amount of resource I can afford to my capability.
To many of my friends family and people I met throughout daily life up to this point, I have always sensed somewhat "belonging to nowhere." It's not that I don't love the people around me or I dislike the state of being around other people, in fact I love other people more than myself which might have been the problem that dragged me apart feeling like I don't fit in anywhere.
This is something I kept secret to my close friends and family to this day since I couldn't even express what I was feeling to the point where I almost got numb.
Since the day one I started backpack traveling from Canada with some fear and perhaps maybe even attempt to run away from society, I was terrified of turning down the expectation of others who trust me.
So I became nobody and started wandering around to find answers without calling anything a name. I just wanted to see things as they are. I became a farmer, dishwasher, camera-man at a strip club for a night, hung out with street performers and all of the travel money stolen the day before I left Cuba.
There were groups of amazing fellow backpack travelers who were mostly on a holiday that helped me reach Mexico City.
That day was also the day when I though I should just quit and go back home. But I was very surprised when I returned to the casa where most Korean travelers were staying at, they were collecting some money to donate in order to safely cover the expenses for me to reach mexico city. Their faces still lingers in my head and the part of my memory is wishing to see them again one day to properly thank so many of those whom I can't recall all of their names..
All of these things led me to keep moving forward despite sometimes feeling like " I don't want to continue this anymore". From all of those who helped a person like me along the journey, I realize it is very easy to fall into an impression that "do I really deserve keep doing this while always getting help from other people? Was I always this helpless? Am I causing trouble to anybody?".
However, this also gave me profound insight into my heart that we cannot live without one another. Not a single piece of cloth that we wear all day is made in vein, not a single food we consume should be taken for granted. Everything we do and participate in this society is connected directly to individual lives and to the environment. Which is no surprise to know.
No wonder we feel separated from everything else by defining ourselves with the ego. No wonder we feel so alienated by everything. It is an experience that can't be explained in words or even by thought alone. These things have to be felt and even that is an understatement. Because I am still naive as a child and curiosity will never stop.
I also understand that no one is perfect and that there is no need to be.
When I was in a foreign school in foreign country for four years during my childhood, I was labled as trouble maker, drop out and a really hot-headed kid. Teachers will tell me you will never be this or that. My parents however, have always supported me to this day in which I can't describe how much I feel appreciation for them having to go through such turmoil throughout my childhood.
Nonetheless, I was a happy kid. Always being fascinated about nature and this burning desire for adventures just by watching Indiana Jones and animation like one piece that really put it through my heart.
Since now my heart rate started to slow down as I am talking about this. It really puts me into perspective that everyone can learn this form whatever experience you might be going through. Because it's the environment that shapes the behavior and not some pre-destined gene that determines our path.
If free will does exist, it might be the relationship that you have with the world and that to me
is wealth.
▶️ DTube
▶️ IPFS
Wow. This is flat out one of the best videos I have ever seen posted on Steem. The fast flyby through the travels was amazing, so well edited to the music, so much crammed in there that my head almost exploded, but somehow you managed to keep it all digestible. And the intro and outro are gold. You are awesome! Welcome to Steem!
Sums it up perfectly. Only thing I'll add, be sure to edit your post and add a YouTube link of the same video (now that you can), cos dtube is going to delete this video in a short while and render this awesome post useless. I hope you see this.
thanks for the heads up ~! So glad you told this to me I didn't know about it you are an angel @misterakpan
X2^^
oh wow thank you so much for watching! Really appreciate the comment and warm welcoming~
So glad you enjoyed :)
Very well said! So true!
Wow, seems like a great experience. I think it is always amazing how much you can learn while traveling.
Reading your story triggers my spiritual side of things. When you mentioned about the value of connection and us being social beings. I fully agree on that thought. As much as I want to be self reliant in my travels and work, I end up asking for help more than I could count especially from the minor things I take for granted.
I think it's a matter of awareness of how helpless we can be when we loose connection and burn bridges. Only when we have lost sight of this connection do we understand we are fragile. You are blessed for the wisdom your journey has taught you, for the safety and comfort your experienced in the hands of strangers.
I think anyone who shares such genuine thought and personal input such as yourself is brave.
You also seem to be a great writer and an artist. I love the way you put into your own words about "connection" with your wisdom.
Just as you said about "asking for help more than I could count", I also felt sometimes.. accepting kindness is harder than to offer it.
I really appreciate for sharing your thoughts with such inspiring comment @adamada
You're welcome and thank you for the positive response. I can tell you learned more from that journey that what your post offered to teach. I think it would be best to serialize your posts with each realization to highlight an important lesson than lumping them all on one post. Cool editing on the video, I forgot to commend you for that in my earlier response.
What a completely kick a$$ video. Everything from the speed the music your voice go so perfectly with the mood being set.
EPIC!!!
thank you for stopping by @jlsplatts really appreciate you enjoyed :)
Wow! I did not want your stories to end. Your camera talent is awesome. Your final sentiment 'i am nothing without others' i beautiful & true. I love that you started out in Southern Alberta & in Saskatchewan! This is where I am from and where i live. Where do you call home now? Congratulations on your very successful blog post @curious3301 it is very well deserved! I hope to get to know you better. All the best to you and your family ❤
Oh you are living in Saskatchewan? Wish I got to stay in Canada longer because I really love the people and nature there! I am Korean by the way, living in Seoul with my family here.
I see that you love to take care and grow plants :) I think that's an awesome thing to have as hobby and passion. Thanks for your warm welcoming @yogajill Wish you great health and well being~
Very nice to get to know you! And, to experience your talent of expressing your stories Gun! I was born in the middle of the province of Saskatchewan. Much of my family lives there and I may one day too. My father passed away 16 years ago and my mom rents out the land now. I live in Strathmore, Alberta. A few hours north of Vulcan. It's a very amazing and powerful place to be. As is your home in Seoul. With mom & dad is a good place to be! I hope my children stay close as their wings grow & they take flight. I got to know one Korean girl while in University. She's a wonderful person. I think Canada became her home since those days. Thanks for looking at my blog 🌸 Catch you next time ✌
Hi curious3301,
Visit curiesteem.com or join the Curie Discord community to learn more.
i was here
@curiius3301 at least you living your life as you want to...reading the adventures and nomadic travel experince feeling excited for all the experinces and fun you are getting. Just enjoy it...i know everyday would be a new learning experince....keep moving ....
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thanks @steemflow Your blog seems really interesting~ getting inspired by so many people on steem here :)
looking forward to see more of your content too!
Ohhh thanks @curious3301 i share whatever i find interesting...and i think you can make anything interesting..with your positive attitude....steem on dear👍
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STOPCool video my friend..Nice share.
thank you!
OHH. :) At the beginning of your story I felt like you are expressing exactly the same what I feel just right now. I feel like I cannot fit to any work, school, expectation. I feel like I'm looking at the Earth from above. I'm out from all perspectives.
Grabbing your backpack and travel the world is so adventures and cool decision but a lonely journey at the same time. Sometimes I don't even know why I am crying but I do. Sometimes so much, feeling like my heart broke into pieces. Then some hours or even minutes later I feel nothing bad can happen, I'm so lucky to travel the world. I'm always up and down and there is no balance.
Sorry for my late reply. "I felt like you are expressing exactly the same what I feel just right now. I feel like I cannot fit to any work, school, expectation..": I also feel like I can relate to what you are expressing. Perhaps there are certain times that you don't feel like you don't belong anywhere because you know all too well that sometimes it feels harder to accept kindness than to offer it.
It's hard to express some of those feelings of being helped by many completely selfless kind human beigns throughout a short span of time with each experience; leaving behind and to constantly move on without being attached yet still caring deeply to remember them.
@lottispirit I wish you the best in your health, well-being and in your journey. The strength of remembering gratitude towards anything and everything that we already have...
(I wasn't able to reply or check these comments until now although it was from 8 months ago... So I guess it's better now than never? :p) really appreciate you for sharing your thoughts and insight on how you felt. It really means a bunch to me. It makes me want to share more genuine stories in the near future!
Amazing storytelling! one of the most difficult thing to do in story telling such as this is keep audience attention, and the way you presented the information in this video I am sure any one that started watching it, watched it all the through to 12 minutes and 48 seconds. Great job again!
yeah I agree totally, from the second the "double" jumped up onto the bed to start eating a bowl of noodles I was hooked LOL
haha XD I had to do something about the awkwardness about myself to make the talking part less awkward or perhaps just lighthearted poking fun. :p
@infocentral I feel very empowered by your comment! Thank you so much~
I was very reluctant to even putting myself in front of a camera to talk about my own stories and just listening to my own voice and looking at my own awkward face made me cringe so hard every time I looked back. So I feel very grateful to know you enjoyed the video thank you!
Hi @curious3301,
Loved your adventure and video wrap up about it. It is great how you came out of it with an entirely different view of the world and your life.
This post was nominated by a @curie curator to be featured in an upcoming Author Showcase that will be posted Saturday evening (U.S. time, about 12-18 hours from now.) on the @curie blog.
NOTE: If you would like us to NOT feature your post in the Author Showcase please reply, email, or DM me on Discord as soon as possible. Any photos or quoted text from your post that we feature will be properly attributed to you as the author.
You can check out our previous Author Showcase to get an idea of what we are doing with these posts.
Thanks for your time and for creating great content.
Gene (@curie curator)
Hi! @randomwanderings first of all, thank you so much for nominating this post! Wow I am very surprised by this especially since last time I logged in was about 8 months ago and didn't see these wonderful comments until just now. My apologies for this really late reply. I almost lost my password for my Steemit account.
I feel deeply honoured to be even mentioned and that it communicated with people in a way I never expected.
Thank you again.
Fantastic closing line. I really understand that line and have found a similar experience in my travels.
I love your video, the editing is very inspiring. Your travel is also super inspiring.
Thank you @activistblog ! Being an activist must be feeling a lot of responsibilities for sure. I really appreciate your comment :)
God, I envy the courage to really do something like this. It seems a lot more difficult than I'd like I to be.
I was actually very nervous and worried before leaving. I was very lucky to have parents that understood me well enough about why I left to do this on my own and supported me emotionally. Along the way, realizing that maybe I was doing it to escape from society; there were times I felt like a coward in this aspect.
So I think before the trip, my preconception about leaving behind was exciting in my imagination and in my head. But when reality hits, the more I realized how much I don't know.
Maybe you do have the courage but just too realistic? ( kind of the opposite of how I was)
Hey nice to hear from you these many months later :) I would love to see more content from you posted on Steem, have you been making any more videos?
yup! but I've been caught up with work so much that I didn't have enough time to even be online... but I will be uploading mini series that I've been working on for about two years now :)