An Open Letter

Dear ADULT neighbors,

I totally get it. Bright sparkly things that explode in the air are pretty and put you in touch with your "inner child," but it's annoying as hell when you launch them EVERY SINGLE NIGHT of the week. It's not a holiday. It can't be a birthday every day for the past three months. No one has that much to celebrate (not living in my neighborhood).

Also, fireworks do not make you cool. They annoy the humans and pets for miles around. They also can blow your hand off and start fires. I understand that you probably think you're invincible and that you're much too smart for anything bad to happen to you, but I can assure you that you are a mere mortal like the rest of us, and that if you blow off your hand or light your face on fire, it will hurt. So as a courtesy to your fellow neighbors and the countless dogs around and to YOURSELF AND YOUR FAMILY, please stop with the fireworks every night of the week. At the very least, limit them to Friday nights, Saturday nights, and holidays.

Sincerely,
Bvid

P.S. Your "inner child" is stupid and I hate them.

FYI: Fireworks are illegal where I live.