It just isn’t right…”what isn’t right you ask?” That someone who gave so much of himself to so many people…should die this way…
Face it…while death is not something we dwell on…there are times in our lives when we are forced to confront it…As a child, it usually began with the death of a pet… depending on the type of pet…it may involve a backyard burial or if a goldfish…a flush down the toilet…in my household, such a “ceremony” usually involved some reference to heaven and god…
As time went on an older relative would pass away…my parents would dress my brothers and I in our Sunday best…we’d be forced to attend the wake having little or no guidance on what to expect….and despite the lack of instruction…we’d somehow manage to look at a dead body in a coffin without freaking out. Of course, when we asked any questions….we’d hear once more about God and Heaven …
As we grew into adulthood…some of us faced the tragic death of someone around our age or perhaps as a parent…the tragic death of a child. There’s no doubt those moments cause a lot of pain and reflection…and I believe a piece of us dies with that person which we never recover.
Gradually as we trend into our senior years…the obituaries become more important to be in touch with. That coupled with the passing of grandparents…parents…aunts…uncles…even friends…leads to almost “regular” visits to the funeral parlor….Sadly one almost becomes immune to it as a method to avoid facing our own mortality…
But face it we must…and like much of life…death can seem very unfair…take my friend Steve… at age 85…about 25 years older than me…having the girth and jolly personality of a Santa Claus… our first encounter 25 years earlier involved him giving me a bear hug as I entered a twelve-step meeting I had been part of for a few years…honestly…the experience annoyed me…I wasn’t a huggable type…but…once I got home…I realized Steve was the one I wanted to be my “sponsor”…
Through his mentorship…friendship…guidance…listening ear…and open honest sharing about his life experience…I came out of my shell…grew up emotionally and into a human being I am proud of today…Even better…I give out hugs at meetings today…
And despite his age…Steve was still full of life…regularly attended meetings and was always available whenever I or the hundreds of others that he befriended needed a listening ear…meanwhile he religiously visited his wife in the nursing home…remaining a loving husband by her side in the 15 years since she suffered a paralyzing stroke…all that despite the multiple debilitating medical issues that challenged him.
No…regardless of his age...such a passive soul doesn’t deserve to die in such a violent unplanned way...but…"we don’t choose our death."
However, we do choose our life…and similar to other times in the past when forced to face my own mortality reality…I realize once more…it’s not how many moments you live…it’s how you live each moment…because…
I want to give a shout out to @grow-pro for helping me with the presentation and edit of my article...he did a magnificent job...and as the cycle of life often shows...in times of pain...we often find a welcoming hand...
A very somber but thought provoking post.
It is said that society is built on the illusion that we will never die. It does seem that way for a long time until our own ageing face in the mirror forces us to face the the truth of the matter. No one escape death and as you say we dont choose when or where it is our time to go.
I am sorry to hear about your friend and my thoughts go out to you.
I also lost a best friend three years ago on Christmas Eve. I was seriously ill in hospital myself at the time. I was even thinking about him when I head the news. I had promised myself that when I got better I would make the effort to spend more time with him. We had somehow gradually drifted apart and when I became ill I realised that he meant a lot to me. My wife came in to visit me and told me he had died of a heart attack in the night. The pain of hear that news was terrible and I am not ashamed to say that I cried for hours. It took me months to get well again but I still miss my old friend more than ever. He looked and acted very much like the old actor Orson Wells, He was so full of life I could not accept that the world could function without him.
Life and death seems so unfair. Unnatural. We are given this great gift of consciousness for a short time and then it is taken away-
I will not get religious on you as I know religion is a person thing but I will say this- I have cheated death 3 times in my life. At 14 I died of an asthma attack and my heart was restarted. At 37 I barely survived a car accident. A huge lorry crashed into the back of me and four other cars killing one driver, seriously injuring 3 others with one left in a wheel chair for life. I myself woke in the hospital missing a kneecap and a back injury. I had to learn to walk again and it was hard work. And three years ago I contracted a serious life threatening virus and was flown to hospital by helicopter. It took a year to recover. So I guess I have looked death in the eye and survived it. But what I wanted to tell was that on each occasion when I faced death, something special happened. At first I felt fear. Surely it was the fear of dying. But then a calmness came over me. My whole body felt like it was being bathed in warm water and then it came. The wonderful sensation that I was going home. To my real home. A home where I was going to receive the best welcome anyone could ever have. I do not want to die just yet, nor for a long time. I feel I have so much more to live and to give. But all I am saying is I do not fear death anymore. I do not know if there is a God but I feel certain that when this life is over it is not the end and where we go from there is a wonderful place.
Best wished to you my good fellow.
Incredible story...Amazing what you have lived through or should I say died through...sorry to hear about your best friend...why can't the universe sprinkle what you went through over a few other people so a few more would appreciate "real" life? Thanks for your powerful thoughts.
It was my pleasure and honour to share @bobreedo
i shear it
???
Very sorry to hear about your friend
Appreciate it.
Have a happy new year stay safe
to you
Thank you.
Thanks for your post!
Please Follow, Upvote & Resteem my post to help us to travel & explore more
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It was my pleasure, @bobreedo. I am sorry for your loss - it sounds like Steve was a genuine friend and those cannot be replaced, although they are never forgotten.
I greatly appreciate your perspective on the topic of death - it is something many of us are afraid to even think about. Losing those that we love and care for is something we all handle a bit differently.
There is no easy way to grieve the loss of a loved one. But we can find strength in the lives of those we mourn the passing of. Their physical presence on Earth ends, but they remain in our hearts and our minds.
We choose our life, not our death. That's a beautiful message, my friend. I am glad our paths aligned when they did and I look forward to a happy, healthy, prosperous 2018!
Thanks again for supporting the Quality Content Initiative on Steemit.
Grateful to have this outlet and receive the incredible well wishes I do...
after that we just ordinary people~
Steve sounds like an amazing person. I am sorry for your loss. It is true that we can only choose the way we live and not the way we die. Thank you for reminding us to appreciate the life that is given to us and to make the most out of it.
You are welcome and thank you for taking time to read my post.
https://steemit.com/poetry/@thinkhappy/the-breath-of-life
The Breath of Life short poetry writting
I think steemit can be a healthy outlet for harnessing those stream of thoughts...keep sharing...Thanks.
this post made me emotional. god bless everyone
You as well.
I enjoy your pictures and your sharing very much, thank you :-)
And I am too sorry for your lost, but death is a great teacher, is teaching us to appreciate life and love people.
Very true...thank you.
Thank you too :-)
good post
Thank you.
good post
Thank you.
I don't agree. We are all making choices internally that the whole world is not aware of. I've come to believe that death is a very personal choice, and that it is not a matter of chance.
I had my life flash before my eyes, and had visions that I might have even died or been seriously injured while on a dirt bike. But instead I put the bike tires back underneath me in a most miraculous way. I've lived since then feeling that death is no accident. I'm far more mindful of my thoughts, I've come to believe the law of attraction is real, that what I think matters.
In talking to people I get very personal, and have found their life situations to match there attitudes of mind, there approach to life. I'd be surprised if you had never had the thought of ending it all. Most people have at one time or another. The question is of the intensity, and how strong your will to live is.
I have a story, from a past girlfriend that really brought this home to me, she tried to kill herself in a moment of despair, but her will to live was still strong. she took many sleeping pills, and probably would have died. but a coworker, who had been to her house exactly once and never visited, felt something was wrong, came over that day, within an hour of her taking the pills, found her, called an ambulance, and saved her life.
I don't think anything that happens is being done to us, but appears that way because we live unconsciously. This incredible events that 'shake us up' tend to wake us up from this slumber. Perhaps your friend is on the edge of awakening to an even greater truth for his life.
I've heard before, and believe, that our spirit moves to the greatest idea we have for ourselves, and the fastest way to close that gap is death. but it doesn't hafta be that way, we can close the gap in this lifetime, but doing it requires a complete change in thinking, overcoming fear. But sometimes the gap is so great, the suffering so severe, that we have an event that those outside see as tragic, but God never makes a mistake, everything is a perfectly aligned for each person and those that end up hearing about it, being there, and going thru it.
peace, love and happiness, let them be your guide. I hope your friend pulls thru.
Fascinating way to look at things...while I agree perhaps we do "invite" realities to ourselves we aren't even aware of...based on sub quantum wave inside us...I do question something like a car accident that wasn't one's choice nor their fault which leads to death...
I too had a "near death" experience back in my college days with a car accident...it was like a slow motion movie...seeing the truck come over the hill while my car drifted into that lane during a bad snow storm...I remember seeing moments of my life pass thru my brain...total peace within...and calmly saying..."this is it" right before the truck crashed into my little 4 cylinder car...needless to say I lived...
Was it all a bigger force orchestrating it all? Or simple random quantum waves? Perhaps in the end...we find the answer...
Thanks for your thoughts...
I no longer think you can look at it that way. Outside events mirror the inner state.
the Law of Attraction orchestrates it all. We are magnets for what we believe.
I've come to see that a random world cannot contain the coincidences i've experienced. however, a intentional world can appear chaotic based upon belief that it is so.
That is what Abraham Hicks keeps telling all of us
Glad to find you on steem, sir.
One of the most interesting discussions in a few weeks.
Thank you for the time and efforts to share your thoughts.
Best regards,
alex
It has been quite a journey.
I’m glad that yours is still going on.
Same as mine.
Law of attraction is the powerful engine that brings us where we think we need to go.
Peace and love and happiness - what else is there to ask for?
These three things give you comfort and pleasure from life’s smallest gifts.
Much respect for your thoughts
Best regards,
alex
Nice post very informative and inspiring
In my faith , knowledge and experience, death is not a big deal because I believe in the next life after death.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts about death @bobreedo :)
Happy New Year!
Thank you for sharing yours...Happy New Year to you as well.
You're welcome!
Dude that was so impressing text !
Thank you very much...
Beautifully explained.. even though i didn't feel like reading, your story forced me to read till the end and that's true a part of us dies when someone close to us departs forever and that part is never to be lived again.. I can understand the pain you must be going through. God Bless your friend and May God relied him off this pain. Amen.
Thank you for sharing your difficult experience...
I am very sorry to hear about your friend. Most people fear death and it is hard to talk about. You are so right, we don't choose our death. I think that is what I like about existentialism though. It explores areas such as the topic of death. It helps others to search their own meaning in life and meaning in suffering, and come to the acceptance that we must live the best life we can since death is inevitable.
Thank you for your kind thoughts...My generation didn't have the comfort level or outlets I see my adult children having...and regardless...I think it is a good reminder...no matter what your age...and how "shit_ty"...life appears at any given moment...its borrowed time...
You're welcome! I hope you have a happy New Year!
we sorry about your friend
Thank you.
Yeah.....life is not static. It's dynamic and how we live or die depends on us. Words are power though. We sometimes kill ourselves by the words we say
Yes...words can do harm...and also show peoples' hearts. Thank you.
Sorry for hearing, but unfortunately no one can choose their own destiny.
Very true. Thank you
Life is a gift, every time we lose a chance to express love our loved ones it also shortens our time to be with that person.
I'm so sad to hear your story about your friend. But, yes its true! We cannot choose our death and we have no choice but to accept it. Thank you for sharing @bobreedo
Keep safe always,
Xoxo
@gerel
Thanks for the warm and heart felt thoughts....
No problem, I appreciate your work.
For me the post was kinda dark. But i agree with you, and i'm sorry for your loss. Also very well explained👍
I understand...for me writing about the "dark" reminds me of the light...Thanks for taking time to read.
OMG! THIS IS MI FIRST COMMENT EVER!!!, im new here but im so excited TO BE PART OF THIS HUGE COMMUNITY OF WONDERFULL PEOPLE LIKE YOU. Your pictures are amazing and I BELIEVE what you are doing here.
I am so sorry for your lost, i know what is like but like all things we must move on.
Glad to know my sharing prompted you to participate...in my short time here...I have found many amazing people...I hope you do as well.
It's a part of our life but i feel sad about your friend. May his soul rest in peace.
Thank you.
Very sorry about that !!
Thank you.
Hey guys wanna get more followers? All you have to do upvote this thread and reply "i follow back" then follow every other person who replied, and voila your followers count will increase in no time.
I follow back
Good read!
hello very nice story i love that i follow you hope to follow me back also @alcabes thank you
follow u pls follow back
Thank you.
I am sorry for the loss of your friend. It sounds like he was doing the work of Angels, right here on earth. My daughters' outlook regarding life: 'Quality, not Quantity.' She died much too soon, almost 9 years ago. Your post rings true.
So sorry to hear about the loss of your angel....Thank you for sharing.
Life is truly the greatest treasure that no money can buy. Never waste a moment.
As the Ad says...."Priceless".....
Death is a reality that we have to face. For me i don't think of it anymore for it could give me a negative outlook in life. We like it or not we are all going to pass by in this world. So all i have to do is enjoy every moment of the day and be thankful for being able to see another day.
I understand...no need to dwell on it...as you say...we are on earth to "live"...something like this just makes us re think what "live" means...thanks.
@bobreedo I am very sorry to hear about your friend. i follow you hope to follow me back also @salmanbahadur thank you
Thank you.
follow u pls follow back
Being a "glass half full" kind of guy, though sorry for your loss, it sounds like you were very fortunate to have had him in your life as long as you did. And he is smiling right now as he reads your touching tribute, as death is just a door, it means very little to the Author of Life *-)
Nicely said...comforting...Thanks.
Yes, sure we should be enjoying our life when you still here!
That's the spirit...
nice photos
Thanks to @grow-pro for those.
Nice
Thanks.
Sorry to hear about the passing of your friend.
Thanks...
Sorry for your loss.
I used to be so scared of the finality of death but, since the passing of my Mum in August 2016 and the spiritual realm making itself known to me, I realise that death as we 'know' it, is a false concept.
When my Mum passed the spirits told me not to be sad - that I should celebrate as she had come home. I have spoken to her since and she is having a ball!
:)
With Love.
xox
Sounds re assuring...thanks.
Yeah, death is a false concept. It is like to say: Universe Matter will disappear one day… your mom’s vibrations are partly yours with all love, care and warmth And there’s no any mystic.
I appreciate your comment, thanks.
The melding of vibrations particularly appeals - I hadn't thought of it like that.
xox
The happier and calmer we are the more in harmony those who gone stay. Every time tuning in this statement you may feel an inner ease and bliss
It's true..we don't choose our death.good post
Thank you.
I am very sorry about the loss of your friend. This post is exactly how I have been feeling lately and you described it so well. This is so beautifully written!! You did a great job. I really like the style of your writing.
Very kind of you...Thank you.
First of all, I am sorry for your loss. Secondly for us who stay alive a food of thought to ponder: Do I treat my most loved ones in the manner that they will miss me when I die? Do I show them how much I care them?
Often in life we are way too busy with nonesense and forget what is important, the people we cherish so dearly. No moment is granted for us.
Wonderful sentiments...I remember I hit a point in my life when I recognized I treated clients or even strangers I hardly knew...better than my own family...needless to say...that changed...thanks for your thoughts.
Greetings of friendship...
Greetings.
The measure of a man's true character is what he would do when he is certain no one will find out.
Gradually as we trend into our senior years…the obituaries become more important to be in touch with(such a melachonly song,and as such,we live in the moment).
God bless you for this piece.
In the end the moment and our character is all we have . Thanks.
Beautiful articule and pictures, Thanks for sharing it. Hi from Venezuela
Thank you for you kind sentiments and hello to you.
Thanks you, I will always follow you.
Thank you for sharing your story. Our lives are not something we can grasp at, like one may grasp for something that has fallen down in a hole and can be reached. It is not something we can hold on to and keep.
It is a gift. A gift from God—each day. The fact that we wake up each morning, we breathe, we have the perfect conditions with the position of the Sun and Moon. Each day is a gift. Isaiah 53:4 says, "He [referring to Jesus Christ] is despised and rejected by men, a Man of sorrows and acquainted with grief".
Christ came down from heaven. He, though still fully God, experienced the pains, sorrows and temptations that we do. He was still fully human—and fully God.
He was the ultimate sacrifice for our sins.
Life, though the miracle that it is, is marked by the stain of sin. Our lives (as humans) are full of regrets, bitter places, dark paths and broken parts. It's by the grace of God that we still wake up, still experience the joys of life, still see a beautiful sun set. He creates our days and paints our paths.
It's because of Christ that we can still have hope. Hope glimmering when pain overwhelms, hope when life knocks the wind out of us; hope still existing somewhere to even reach out at when we experience the valleys of life. Hope.
Very powerful thoughts and a comforting song...thank you.
Good post👍 followed and upvote you hope you will do same for me😊
I thank you and will follow.
You welcome😊
https://steemit.com/steemit/@luzclaritareyes/i-am-new-to-steemit-luz-clarita-reyes-introduce-your-self
This made me emotional, its was a beautiful post. Thank you for sharing. We should share more of our personal stories. Keep smiling.
I find writing a positive way to express my emotions...thank you for taking time to read and express...
Aww your welcome
The affections do not disappear with death ... they take hold in our hearts and allow us to remember them as the people who were important to us in life
So true...they become part of our inner fabric...
Nice post! I follow you! =)
I appreciate that.
Friend whose hand I shook on Christmas day was gone a few days later with no warning. It is the craziest feeling.
So true...hard to process.
The most romantic is to meet and escort dawn sunset....
Yes.
I am truly sorry about your loss. I've had so many of these same thoughts. I'm glad you shared this with us.
Thank you...Glad you could relate.