Beginnings

When we were young children, the world seems to be perfect. But, as we grow, we learned the world is not what we perceived it to be. Cruelty, lies, and betrayal are, unfortunately, common practices in this world. Why can't the world be more perfect? I'm sure have asked ourselves this question at some point during our lifetimes.

We've been through our ups and downs, highs, and lows. Some appear to be happy, whether it is rain or shine. For others, depression is a part of life. As they gaze at others looking at people laughing together, they wondered when will they finally find happiness as described in fairy-tales. Why is happiness so good at playing hide-and-seek?

Depressions

While there are many factors for the reason of being sad. You should agree that it is largely because of another's judgment. Perhaps you hate yourself because you failed someone special. Or maybe, society rejected your ideas and behaviors as it not aligned to their beliefs.

Imagine if I've locked you up for no particular reason. Would you live on while following my obligations? Would you protest because I've limited your physical freedom? Most likely, you would protest. You probably don't want anyone to restrict your independence and the ability to exercise your rights. Now, if so, why aren't you protesting if I've locked you up emotionally? Why are you allowing your emotions to be influenced by another's beliefs?

These are the general ideas of an Indian philosopher I came across some time back. It was striking, accurate, and made me realize how much of my emotions are influenced by the people I mix with. I wanted to be accepted; pleasing others even when I'm sacrificing myself. What did I receive in the process? Some acceptance? possibly. Some positivity? Hopefully. But what did I lose? Time for better things? Perhaps. Independence? Mayhap. Myself? Definitely.

Lost

I've lost myself.

My ideas, my actions. I began to realize I've changed, not negative in every way. However, I've got zero "self". Nada.

I've changed in a way that generally, pleases others, not myself. I couldn't take it when others talk negativity of my decisions, it sounds pathetic and it is. Because I've willingly permitted others to lock me up in an emotional abyss.

Growth

Thankfully, I've grown and learned. I changed my "change" and began to be more confident in my judgments and decisions. Life is better when you ignore people's meaningless gossips. I am not asking you to ignore useful advice from others, but to trust in yourself more. Always question, but trust. I am sure that you have the mind to make the right choice. God gave you a brain, use it.

A quick reminder to spend some time with your loved ones if you've surfed the web for too long. Yup, the internet is interesting but your special ones are important. :)

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