There once was a lady who lived on some rather nice land. There were trees and bees and other assorted pleasantries scattered around. I'm going to just go ahead and name this lady.....Axey!

Axey was busy minding her own business and planting some flowers in pots for the patio. She was also pondering about starting an herb garden. The breeze was cold but her warm, baggy sweatshirt from Target made being outdoors quite pleasant. While trimming up a few little shrubs a strange voice was heard from below. "Axey, it's too soon to plant anything, I just want to be helpful and let you know if you plant ANYTHING now they will die!"

The nosey neighbor was at it again with the "helpful" suggestions and Axey had no choice but to wave and smile and nod like she agreed. She didn't...... she knew exactly what would do just fine in the transitioning seasons because she'd farmed before.

Axey then realized she needed to pick up some groceries and make dinner because eating is important! She was picking out some produce while yet another voice from behind chirped in..... "Oh don't eat that, NEVER eat that! Don't you know that type of fruit will induce nothing but a stomach ache and also did you know that even though it says Non-GMO, it could be a total lie. If you eat these things instead of what I think you should eat you will have horrible stomach cramps!"
Being as curt and polite as possible Axey replied, "Thanks for that advice as I've actually grown this type of food and never had a stomach issue ever, but thanks so much for the unsolicited input."

Axey finally got home and turned on some Netflix to chill out with. A knock on the door, OH NO! She was scowling by this part of the day and went to the door and put on her happy face. "Hi Axey, I just couldn't help but hear you watching a scary movie. I hope you realize the damage that watching that movie will do to your Chakra alignment...." the neighbor was about to carry on but Axey decided to just close the door with a smirk and return to her comfy chair and turn up "Nightmare on Elmstreet" as loud as possible. .......... Finally, Peace!

Axey's new boyfriend was laughing his ass off cooking Spinach Tortellini with a beautiful Pesto sauce and some shaved Truffles on top wearing an apron that said, "Kiss the Chef"......so Axey walked right on over and did just that!

The End (Everything I described actually happened, any Similarities to an actual neighbor are Purely Intentional)