Forever

We get it, you did a good job
it's everyone else that didn't
We should care about you
and we would, we really would
if you just gave us some hole to climb through
the glimmering wall of your ego

YOU tried, no one else did
big hero
I beg to satisfy you on my knees
my tears of regret mix with the sweat
anticipating your verdict
You felt you deserved this, no one else did.

Because I am only as good as you say I am
forever

Choking on the breaths I take, I remember
Small wrist bones, large voices, my head beat purple
the fight, to even want to get back up
and the inevitable, searing pain which adds the edge to my words
endlessly, 'what a gift you have'!
and you mock me with it, because YOU did a good job

I see you so often, I wonder if I am the outlier
You dig your fingers in, and claim it was a hand up
a silly girl, if you didn't redirect me, my ideas could take hold
and I'd float from your awareness
but you won't let that happen, will you?
You'll do a good job, no one else will.

You'll be there when people dream
or when they're ready to give it all away
You'll be there when all is lost
and on the sunniest days
You'll seep into the birthing, and slither from the wake
no matter the occasion, you'll arrive to be rank

Because we are only as good as you say we are
Forever