Confusion, Madness, pain, Anguish and despair. They are all those emotions that that man, facing the cold subway tracks felt once his soon suicide was decided ...
A seemingly quiet day at work, fulfilling the routine, being an operator at one of the subway stations.
Acheting me of a routine that overwhelms me and of a strong crisis (that for nobody is secret) that affects us without mercy or distinction.
11:20 am marks the clock of the station and with despair and fear a girl approaches me, alleging that a user was about to project to the train tracks, immediately and without thinking much I run and feel like the time around me it slows down, the adrenaline and my heart a thousand, the senses sharpened by mere instinct and a cold sensation that runs through my back.
I RUN !!! I run with despair until arriving at the platform, where the users point to a young man who was sitting on the edge of it, waiting for the train that was approaching quickly to the station, I can not describe that moment exactly, where I acted by mere instinct, where I forgot procedures and manuals, where I put my own life at risk to save someone else's, something took over my being when I saw that boy with his hands on his face crying and decided to put an end to his life.
The train closer and closer to its entrance to the station, the users watched bewildered to brag about what would happen, a pitiful environment where no one reacted to such a situation, a novice operator who ran towards the crowd, which rushes to this and he takes it hard by the torso, without thinking he throws it to the center of the platform, they fall together and he hugs him tightly preventing that boy decided to die that day could move. Maybe after that, it took 10 or 15 seconds for the train to reach the station.
Between a tear and a voice choked with crying and pain, I will always remember these words
I want to die, let go I want to die and no longer be the burden of anyone!
Impacted by what happened, my mind scheming and drawing conclusions from what can happen, if I did not take those decisions quickly that triggered that fact. returning the reason to me, I proceeded to request the respective support, after what happened and now with much more calm apply the respective procedure for this type of cases.
Once alone with that boy, a partner and I asked him seriously why that decision.
That boy of only 26 years told us with so much pain and hardship his sad and unfortunate story, he was a person who from youth walked in the streets, fighting alone against the world in search of being able to survive, living day to day, he says He suffered from a mental disability, which needed medication that despite the situation of the country, they are difficult to access despite the scarcity and high prices, not only with this he also suffered from abuse in his home, by his "wife" because which we investigated a little more and thanks to some contacts we were able to confirm that it was like that, that there were already several complaints from the neighbors to her, due to mistreatment. He was depressed because he had recently lost his job, the only thing that helped him to bring some food to the home to feed his 3-year-old little boy (Sebastian), in a weak voice he said that he had 2 days without eating as much as he was getting for his little son
Perplexed by its history, impressed by how life can be so cruel to a person, which from it only arose confusion and pain, it did not reflect any evil.
Between words, he said that he did not care if he left his little son alone, that, in the same way, he was not useful at all and that he would not make any difference if he was no longer in his life, he had decided to take his own life after receiving so many blows along this, said that a large emptiness seized his chest and a black cloud blinded his eyes, as a person doped and disconnected from reasoning, choose to end the spark of his life, guided by the hand by the sweet temptation of death and his promise to free him, free him from the suffering that life has given him.
The minutes passed, the hours came and between tears and words that cloud was moving away more and more ... already calm and after so much thinking about life, the reasons, problems and other this young man looked up but in his eyes if they were fixed carefully, you could see a soul that was crying out for help from someone, someone who extended his hand, even just once, and that this was a real help not as he counted that he had been tricked so many times by people he called "liars on duty"
I felt that responsibility to do something, I could not sit idly by, I picked up my phone and started calling people who could not only advise me on the case, but I could provide a little tangible help.
Quickly and for reasons superior to me, things of the same universe those helps came out afloat, very kind people invited him to eat, gave him food to take home, received a donation of food, a small help, a small patch for that dark day, unfortunately that will not change your situation.
I accompanied him to the exit, where he told me, if it is not today, it will be when and where, today I thank you and your companions for saving me and for giving me all this, things that I did not ask, I am very grateful and that my God bless everyone, we said goodbye with a big hug, that felt so cold, because they were clear and in sight all those and voices that murmured in his mind ...
