Well to start with, I dont normally do things like blogs or personal stories. I am a simple man of 32 with simple tastes, and have been very content with that way of life since I was a teenager. I never stepped on anyone's toes, I went out of my way to hold doors, pull out chairs, offer a kind smile to an awkward situation, and often apologize, often over nothing.
That way of life was comfortable to me. It didn't get me anywhere or bring me any success in society but it made me personally feel a bit better. I liked seeing someone in a bad mood crack a smile, just because I helped then with something so tiny. It felt good and it felt like I made a difference in someone's day for the better.
This very obviously comes with a downside, which many could already guess from the start.
A person like me is also a target. A bullseye, a mark, someone to be taken advantage of. I may not be very important or a great success, but I'm also by no means oblivious either. I know "favors"never get reciprocated, but i help anyway. It is deep rooted in my being to be kind to people, regardless of what they do to me.
This personality trait/flaw is part of what makes me the person I am and I doubt I'll change much any time soon.
Today, I face a new kind of dilema. A problem that i personally have great difficulty coming to a proper conclusion on. I have a son and a daughter, who are my whole world. And now i no longer am able to think about what I want and instead must think about what they need.
Those same "favors" i gave to others, whether it be swapping shifts to a coworker, tossing a couple dollars to a homeless person, even just doing my boss a favor and doing some work off the clock. Everything affects my children now. The ultimate experience in growing up as an adult.
I've also found that these values I've had all these years are not as forgiving in today's world. I've raised my children to be kind and thoughtful but my son has already started to suffer as a child because of it. Other children are not raised to be kind. Even his own cousin takes advantage of him. I fear that by teaching him these valies that i may actually make his life extremely difficult.
So this is where I am. A simple man with simple tastes, a father with two wonderful children, fearful that my own simple ways may lead to a harsh life to those that i would give my very life for.
If you are a parent, feel free to share your own views and techniques used to teach your children the skills needed to succeed and be happy.
Hello and welcome to steemit! This was an interesting read. Having a kid of my own and growing up somewhat like yourself, I can totally relate.
The problem is that prejudice works both ways and it is always faulty. You cannot treat everyone with kindness and expect them to respond accordingly. The same goes for the opposite.
I believe that the "correct" approach is to treat everyone "neutrally" until you decide based on critical thinking and by the passing of time on if they deserve your kindness. There are all kinds of people out there, exposed in all kinds of situations. You could never know if someone's self interest will work against you. Most probably it will. And this is more common that we realize. It is part of human nature. Self preservation, search for happiness, tendency for competition e.t.c. almost work automatically.
I hope this all makes sense. English is not my native language.
Talk to you soon.
Nice coded write up @ozumba
Sorry I'm still extremely new to this, coded? I'm a bit of a dummy to the lingo haha.