welcome! thankyou for your open-ness and honesty here. the reality of money, in general, is that it has had most of doing what we don't want to do - just to gain access to the abundance that is rightfully ours until we BUY into the idea that everything has to be worked for. fruit is intended to grow abundantly on trees all around, for example - freely given by the mother of us all.. yet 'civilised' humans decided it was more 'productive' to kill most of the free trees and ensure you must work to gain access to shops to get the food.
steemit is a digital representation of the anarchy that will solve some of our problems once the majority realise they are naturaly anarchic! ;)