Hey!

I've been wanting to join the blogging world for a while now. My objective is simple: create value for others by sharing what I like. By no means is this a new revelation to everyone doing the exact same thing, but this motto helps fight off all the impostor syndrome that I suffer from every time I attempt to write of share my passions to a large audience. I have picked steemit (...is it all lowercase?) to be my main writing platform because of its apparent simplicity, being innovative with its goals and philosophy.

So.. what is it that I find worth sharing?

My thoughts

That's pretty redundant and almost not worth noting at all. However, I do think I have an okay head on my shoulders. I'm confident enough to share, but I don't want to over-value myself either. I enjoy talking about deep topics that take a lot of thought to break into.

My Story

The value of this whole.. blog... thing... comes from my personal story. Everyone can create value from sharing their stories. Our stories are how we can learn from each other. It's always a good idea to go to more than once source when looking up information on any given topic. This is true in science, blogs, history, make up tutorials, video games, crypto-currencies, fiat-currencies, coffee, oil- the list only limited to the imagination thinking it up.

My story is a lot like most peoples' which makes me relatable. It's also different from most peoples' which makes me interesting. You can decide for yourself how you want to use my story. I'm from Missouri. I've lived here my whole life. I'm married, we have a child, and we have a dog. I work a job that pays well enough and with benefits. I enjoy video games, music, coffee, fencing (with swords!), and much more. I want to talk about all of these!

Despite all these pretty great things in my life, I'm also pretty sure I have depression as well as some kind of OCD. I'm looking into speaking with a psychologist about it. I've been thinking of doing that for a while. The tipping point that made me act on this decision came from playing Doki Doki Literature Club with my wife. I've been dealing with this stuff for a while and I feel like I could keep on going as I have always done. I've developed my personal coping mechanisms that keep me going and motivating me. But I decided to meet with a professional because I want to know myself better. I can only learn so much from me being the only person in my head. I also know that I'm not alone.

I tagged motivation for this reason. I know there are a lot of people like me. I don't need to put into words in what ways they are, because I think they already know how similar we might be, but I'll try. I've felt useless, unskilled, falling behind, weird, awkward, anxious, dumb. Like I'll never amount to anything. Even if I did amount to something, what's the point? This existence is self-contradicting madness... but I think it's worth understanding. I believe that 100 years (give or take) is a short time to live with all the pain and emptiness that life tends to bring with it. I want to finish this race. I want to finish it well; and because I know there are people like me, I want to help them finish the race and finish it well too.

...that escalated quickly!

So! Recap! I'm a normal guy with cool hobbies on a quest for personal balance, meaning, and mental optimization!

this is my intro post! Have a good one, friends!