Introducing myself

Hi. I'd like to introduce myself.

I was born in the south. I was raised right. Both parents were on their second marriage. Theirs was a cold, dead relationship to be honest. I grew up in a deeply religious household. Not so much because of my Dad. He was a small town worker giving away more than he took. No real drive anymore. I think any drive he had long ended with the first marriage. Mom though, she was born again and in love with Jesus.

Around age 8, I dodged being kidnapped on an old country road near the interstate. I was on my bicycle when he pinned down the handlebars, got some groping in and then in a turn of events stopped what he was doing and took off. I dreamt angels had saved me.

At 11 or so, I had hands laid on me while a group of believers spoke in tongues and cast demons out of me.

High school was sports 24/7.

College started on academic and athletic scholarships. Didn't end that way though. It was a struggle to graduate. After my second year of college I was first diagnosed with depression. I never took it serious. Out of college I coached ball and got married. Things were looking great. Especially on the outside. But I was miserable. Always have been. Since, I've been an entrepreneur starting and selling businesses. I've failed more than I've succeeded.

I'm miserable. I loathe myself. I have treatment resistant depression. Any day of the week I could wake up to it being boarder line debilitating. My days can be a struggle to get through and I'm on a handful of medicine's.

My next step is probably treatments of Ketamine. Since I'm diagnosed treatment resistant, I'm eligible for these doctor administrated doses. I'm also open to going to South America for ayahuasca.

I read, listen to podcasts, play guitar, study painting and enjoy family life.

“When I was 5 years old, my mother always told me that happiness was the key to life. When I went to school, they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I wrote down ‘happy’. They told me I didn’t understand the assignment, and I told them they didn’t understand life.” -John Lennon