I'm not sure about all the techie stuff in your post, but never sell yourself short. You're all you've got in this universe and if you don't believe in yourself first, then you've got some changes to make. It's a great community here, keep going and we will help each other out on this journey.
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Thanks @moonflower , Don't worry one day I will be the best dev ever and I will shout it from the rooftops. But for now somebody has to claim the title of the Worst. :P ..But ye jokes aside I have a pretty confident attitude that I am a pretty decent designer/front-ender.