Thank you for elaborating on the comment @movievigilante made. I agree the first comment lacked the constructive part . I see where you are coming from! and I can agree the flow could have definitely been better! This poem was already me stepping out of my comfort zone when it comes to what I typically write, and as I learn and grow the steps I take along the way may be sloppy but I'll continue to move forward molding my technique. Definitely plan on practicing free verse and more writing styles in general! Anyways I appreciate the constructive criticism! I am always looking for ways to improve.