Hello I'm @conciousthinker & This Is My Introduction Post

in #introduceyourself7 years ago (edited)


This is my #introduceyourself post although it's my 2nd post (3rd if you count DTube) as to get started I entered a competition which helped me learn my own way, which, if you make it to the end, you should understand why I have to learn in unconventional ways.


I initially came here to escape the YouTube ‘echo chamber’ with hopes of detailing my experience of a lifetime in what I thought was the truth movement. I expect it will be a recurring and underlying theme of posts to come but...


I am not a truther!


I survived the severe control that all things conspiracy or truth have on the mind. I hope to offer a different perspective where the difference between truth and belief is clear and I will never ask you to trust me unless I am talking about my personal experience which is presented only as testimony relating to how I reached my conclusions. In short I won't be claiming to have insider information about the government or colonies on Mars, only information about the time I believed such things from others.


I never had a desire to be on ‘social media’ or blogging, but on Steemit I see opportunities to experiment with creativity, the one constant I’ve kept throughout my unstable, ever changing ‘background’.


Initially my background was meant to be left out with anonymity being the goal. Despite still having reservations about sharing this, I feel without knowing my history and details, the psychology behind the decisions that lead me down the rabbit hole and the difficulty in returning, would be lost in what will essentially be autobiographical posts.


To this day it's difficult for me to describe so I thought I would let this ‘diary entry’ I wrote a few years back do the talking…


I write this at a time when at last, I feel mentally able. My life is now in its thirty first year. I sometimes think I'm thirty two years old as my brain cannot work out what day or month it is so people's (and even my own) age, birthdays and other details people expect you to remember aren't something that sticks in my memory.
It wasn't always like this, though I can't recall the last time my brain was running at a level most would consider 'normal’. That's why I decided to write this now.
I write from a viewpoint of the person I am today. The person I am today isn't the same person who I will be writing about. The person I was I guess you could say was born after a brain injury aged eighteen. I felt I woke a different person. A person I had to get to know and learn to live with.
The injury sent my life in directions I could never conceive of. I further became different people as the effects of the brain damage rewired me and my attempts to comprehend this created people looking back on, I don't recognise anymore.
While writing this the fluctuating mindset over the past few weeks caused by simply a common cold, has made it even more clear to me how drastically my character, personality, emotions… These words I am cycling through, trying to describe how the brain injury changed me are close but not able to fully convey the complexities of the changes my mind has been subjected to.
This difficulty to explain, how I felt and why I felt I was falling apart, is partly to blame for the years without help and doctors making the situation worse.
How do you explain to a doctor that you woke up, as I generally remember saying, “a different person”?


So that is my past. I am always recovering, not from the physical injury but the deeper subconscious effects that I had to dive deep into and face the pieces of the past that create the person I am today. I called the account @consciousthinker as I used to call myself a critical thinker despite being trapped in the truth movement. Today I work every single second to understand what most take for granted… Their own identity or ego.


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Welcome to steemit friend. Authenticity is key and It looks like you're someone whos interested in the "real"

I write from a viewpoint of the person I am today.

That's all anyone can expect <3 Welcome to Steemit! I think you'll like it here :)

Agreed! Stay authentic.
Highly rEsteemed and welcome to the New Age Pilgrim...

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I will, I suppose all I have to offer is my experience and what lessons I learned usually the hard way! Thanks again, I am really looking forward to being a part of the community.

You're already a part! Just keep being your awesome self- bit by bit, you'll get exactly where you need to be <3

YES. So much yes @frankbacon!

Thank you, I was very nervous about posting that... You're right, I couldn't convey my experiences without telling the full story. Now it's out there I think it will help me to write without any fear and hopefully that will lead to better writing!

No need to be nervous friend-- I have found that steemit has some really lovely understanding and supportive folks on it. Just be yourself and share what's on your heart and mind <3

Exploring Perception, Memory, Ego, mind, thoughts and time. You may also want to explore “walk ins” for a complex spiral of possibilities to write about. I think most important will be your feelings about the Now. Most people get hung up on their past lug their baggage to every new situation. You will be free of baggage and be allowed to experience events in the Moment. Many spiritual seekers hope to understand the Now more clearly. You can teach that ! My brother has a similar challenge it used to get me upset that he did not remember all of the days and nights we worked on his homewoek or I did a puppet show for him or broke up a fight with the bully that hit him. He has no recolection of any of it. When he sees me he has to learn that I am his big sister again and then we have a great chat, but it is focussed in the Now! I look forward to reading your blog.

Sorry to hear about your brother. I have been assisted by clinics that deal with brain injuries and get to see cases that are a lot more extreme than my own which makes me feel very thankful and lucky despite the damage as I am who I am because of the experience and I finally feel comfortable as and like the person I am today. I am here for any help or advice if I have anything that may be of use to others who have been or are dealing with a similar situation. That's the only thing I hope to be able to achieve on Steemit.

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Nicely written piece, it's good to meet another conscious thinker. I look forward to learning more, and sharing your words. (walk-in perhaps?)

I am enjoying the platform and the people are great. Enjoying your work too. Thanks for the kind words.