It's not true that God won't put you into a situation that you cannot bear. It sounds a lot like the lie that God won't give you more than you can handle. My first wife was my first love. We were very close. She died after a long illness at the age of 30. I was devastated but God gave me the strength to get through it.
(Philippians 4:13 NIV) I can do everything through him who gives me strength.
I understand my friend, yes it sounds the same you see Exactly God will not give you burden that you cannot handle because He will give you the strength that you need and every circumstance wether good or bad has a signifince when you just trust unto Him... i am sorry to hear about your wife, God is full of surprises I believe He has great plans for you... just keep and believing and follow His teaching s for enlightenment . Tnx God bless