Something that I often wonder about is the way child sexual abuse affected my sister and I so differently. My sister has had many sexual partners and I believe that she always sought love through sex. When a man wanted sex with her, it made her feel wanted.
I've always been uncomfortable with sex and felt ashamed when I took pleasure in it. I wonder if it could have been down to our differences in age as most of my abuse took place in my teens, while my sister's stopped when she was 8.
Am I allowed to express what just came into my mind when I read it? I don't want to overstep, however feel like there's a connection to the memory you wrote about and this fact. Maybe saying that alone says everything already. ;)
Please express away. Part of why I'm sharing is to try and get a handle on this in my head and I think outside input could help. I'm psyching myself up for the next share. It's something I've never admitted to anyone.