How to Make Friends and Influence People.

There's a lot of things to do to makes friends and influence people....

A lot of people don't realize how easy it is to make friends, you just have to step out of that comfort zone and do it, I play the three second game, I give myself three seconds to come to a decision on things and if i know it's something I have to do, I just push myself out there and don't think about it. Whatever happens happens and no matter what, the worst that can happen is rejection. I always like to start out saying hi my name is blank whats yours? Then my follow up questions are who do you know(both associate with the same people(same culture)), how(them telling a story to you puts you in the story, while the person will associate that story with you) and when(this puts you into their past, making you into a more solid figure in their past, associating you with their past making it seem that you've known them longer the the second you just met them), see by asking all these questions the person will like you more because you're listening to them and you're interested in them, I always like to throw in little details because everyone usually does at least one insignificant thing to their person or apparel, that's a good thing to point out that difference and they'll appreciate that you noticed this. Lastly which I'll talk about in a moment is to ask them for a favor, this makes them feel that they're needed, wanted or are helpful to you, giving them a slight purpose to them, everyone wants to be noticed on the little things, asked about themselves so they can ego jerk and like to be useful and have a purpose, with all these things they'll think you're intelligent, nice, charismatic, perceptive and caring. 

Now people think that doing a favor for someone will give them a leg up but that isn't fair since now the person feels they are being guilt-tripped into doing something and makes them feel resentful and unwilling to corporate in the future. Instead just ask for help and offer them a reward of either company, drinks, food or whatever they may favor. 

I want to mention that being the nice guy is noble but will get you no where in the end, the not so nice people will take advantage of you and walk over you, stepping on your fingers up the ladder. There's a good balance that comes with this. We all have beliefs and integrity to some degree and those things there should be unwavering (nice guys trample their beliefs to pander to the crowd and this makes them seem weak, submissive and not a strong character) if someone questions or belittles your beliefs, explain to them either in an assertive or debatable response on which why you feel that way, why they have their own beliefs that you may not be in favor of but you're not looking to change their beliefs.

It's always smart in first encounters never to speak of religion or politics, for that is a divider, look for common ground and enhance it to such a degree, where you are weaved into their story and their hobbies.

Selective niceness is needed to be seen as humble yet strong with integrity, the nice guy will always be out of the limelight if there's an alpha person, you don't have to be aggressive, assertive and stubborn to be the alpha, it can be completed just by talking to everyone, laughing with everyone, being open to response but slow to release your own personal history (it gives a sense of mystery and excitement), but also do things that would be bizarre behavior, like maybe a crude joke with good timing, maybe bringing the party with you with friends that are very high energy, very dominate in a social environment because they'll be your wing man, you could also be the music provider or bring the N64 with smash.

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