My mother in law feels she doesn't have to follow the rules in my house. We take our shoes off at the door, but when no one is around, she won't. Well, If I or my husband are not around she wot. I catch her every weekend when she comes over. She lives in an apartment and cannot have her dog with her, so he lives with us. She comes over every morning to care for him.
I told my husband that I was tired of her walking on the carpet and he told ME to say something. I sent her a text. I asked her not to walk on the carpet with her shoes on. She replied that she only does that when she is about to leave. No, I have caught her numerous times and she was not leaving. I would not do that to her house or anyone else. If I see shoes at the door, I would assume that you have to take them off, I actually take my shoes off at everyone's house. I don't visit people who have a dirty house, If I ever come into contact with someone like that, I would just stand at the door and not move.
Now she won't talk to me for about 6 months or even ever. Her loss!