The Gift Of The Holidays

in #holiday8 years ago (edited)

“If you will be alone this Christmas and are having a hard time with the holidays, if you would like a call or a gift or just to feel loved, please PM me. I have love to give.”

I woke up the other day to this post from a friend on Facebook.

This is the essence of what the holidays should be about, no matter what traditions you and your family celebrate.

As the final two weeks before Christmas unfolds for our family, I have much to be grateful for.

Mostly, I am grateful for the spirit of kindness that I believe most people carry within. My friend's post received many private responses. And that made me think this:

To all the sad, broken, and lonely people out there, you are not alone.

The holidays often bring out great sadness and loss. Perhaps it is due to the shortened days. Maybe it is because we are reminded that some loved ones are no longer with us to celebrate family and home cuddled up to a roaring fire (depending on where you may be in the world - maybe you celebrate the holidays reveling in full summertime glory). You might be estranged from family members who have hurt you in the past.

Either way, this time of year can be bittersweet, and we desperately try to ameliorate the emptiness within. The world's political climate is precarious, and we have many reasons to feel fearful about our future with all the senseless violence we hear about every day. I think of @macksby's post a few days ago about New York and the heightened security that pollutes the mood with images of violence and armed guards lining the streets

But I know this. The sadness that goes along with this time of year has so much to do with our lack of connection to each other. Every year we sink more into the pit of self-obsession with our gadgets that keep us from real time conversations. Humans need direct and meaningful interactions with others to thrive. We all know babies die without touch and feeling loved. Adults suffer too. We aren't meant to live parallel lives, disconnected from our families and communities.

This Facebook post from my friend made a huge impact on the way I plan on celebrating this year.

When you think about it, it's tragic that the madness begins on Thanksgiving Day. The goal is accumulation and being first to snag deals on useless gadgets and latest popular culture obsessions.


courtesy of ebaumsworld.com

Apparently there's something this year called Hatchimals? Stores are out of them (genius marketing) and people are losing their minds.

Is it worth it? Why participate? You have a choice. Has society become so materialistic that we are willing to shove people out of our way to desperately gather up things we don't need? Thanks to the media for telling us how much better off we will be if we buy into the madness.

That's not for me or my family. Last weekend I took my children to Target to buy gifts for women and children's shelters for their clubs at school. These women fled from dangerous homes, many risking their lives, with little more than their children and the clothing on their backs. They don't know what their futures hold. No doubt for them the holidays will have a different meaning all together - maybe a chance to celebrate being alive and free for the first time in their lives. That's at the opposite end of the spectrum from those who think three new 80" televisions and the latest toy craze are the answers to bliss.

Here's what is really important for me to give this year. The gift of my time. Pure, undistracted time, time to pay attention to those I love. Time to make new memories by slowing down, sipping hot chocolate and watching It's a Wonderful Life with my family. It is time to reflect on warm memories from the past, and perhaps most importantly, making things a little more bearable for those who are not so fortunate.

My friend's message struck a deep chord and became an important lesson at our house this year. Because the real meaning of Christmas is not about lists and what you want as gifts. It's what you can give.

And the holidays are a perfect time to create new traditions of giving.

I urge all of us here, as Steemit celebrates its first holiday season, to set an example of giving. Don't forget those in need. You would be surprised how life-altering a gift of a book can be to a child who has lost his home due to domestic violence. Such a small thing as a bottle of nail polish or a bath bomb for a mother who feels like she will never again feel like a woman can keep her strong so she can face another day. A pretty little brush and some hair elastics can bring unfathomable joy to a little girl who watched her mother get beaten up. These are only some examples.

How about making a visit to a nursing home? Get to know some of the residents. You can't know how their lives would be brightened to make new friends. Make some cookies with your kids and arrange a visit. The stories they have to tell can be priceless.

Please make a difference to someone this year, and remember the true joy of giving hope to others.

You can't put that feeling in a shopping cart.

The real truth is, we are at our happiest when we help others.

So cheers to you, Ryan, for being so gracious and generous with your offer. The world needs more gentle souls like you. You have offered a beacon of hope to many, and the world is a better place because you are in it.

Illustration © Johanna Westerman 2016

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You have nailed so much that is Fu%ked Up.., not only with this time of year -- but the state of our world today. After being re-introduced to the O.Henry story "Gift of the Magi" (out getting drunk in the name of the holidays last night) and the shining example, of what the true meaning of the holidays are all about… The sacrifice of giving.., provoked by love.

I doubt many of the children today, would even take this story seriously -- maybe some of the sentimental ones.., but most would have trouble, recalling first-hand experience, when it comes to giving selflessly…

While the addiction to all of our gadgets and the lack of human contact isolates us more.., and the media and advertisers telling us, we've never been more connected… "There are less fortunate people, there are women struggling to start over -- children not getting a toy"

But there are plenty of us out there, to help make their holiday (their life) a little brighter. Because we all know how dark it gets, when you're in that place.., and how -- completely alone you feel…

And it just requires a bit of our time and attention…

Happy Holidays @fairytalelife!

Ah yes, @macksby. Your post inspired this one. Thank you. And to you as well.

Nice as always Johanna. I wish you the best for the holidays.

Thank you, @joseph. And to you as well!

beautiful post and I love that you and so many others are finding heartfelt and meaningful ways to give during the holidays!

Thank you, @natureofbeing. I think if we all spent more time counting our blessings and putting ourselves in others' shoes, the world would be a better place.

I couldn't agree more! I hope you enjoy the holidays @fairtalelife.

I completely agree with you that humans need direct and meaningful interactions with others to thrive. I wrote a post about this a week ago.
https://steemit.com/life/@countryinspired/i-was-seeking-a-job-what-i-found-was-a-whole-new-outlook-on-work
I see the value of good relationships more and more as I grow older.

Fantastic post, by the way. Upvoted and now following.

I do too, @countryinspired. With age comes wisdom. If we don't have these connections, we wither up and die. I think of Gollum in LOTR. All he cared about was greed and the ring poisoned his soul. So does material greed. It's one of the seven deadly sins for a reason. Thank you for your comment.

Extremely touching post Johanna.
Here in supermarkets we have occasional baskets for the clothes and gifts for children. Do you have these too?
Many pensioners here are really poor too, so in the schools there is a tradition to gather some food for them, as well as some small gifts for the orphanages.
Since war began here (three years already, damn it), it's regular to gather some food, clothes and money for the soldiers.
Thanks for posting this, it may inspire a lot of people to recall that they are humans :D

Thanks, @richman. We do. And fire stations have boxes in front for toy donations. Food markets have holiday meals you can purchase for hungry families, so we do that too. It's so important to teach our kids to share their luck. Despite what the media would have you believe, the world is full of more people who don't have than do.

This post speaks so much truth. The world needs reminders like this because we’re literally being bombarded each moment of our waking lives with carefully crafted messages designed to make us buy, consume, judge, be fearful, succumb to only our most basic of instincts.

So many are feeling the despair this year. I can’t remember a more precarious time in my entire life in regards to national and world politics. Yet our lives are also peppered with reminders like this post…to connect, face-to-face with our fellow human beings, help others in need, and reminders from others if you are in need you are not alone.

As long as I see these reminders from the universe I am able to keep that flame of hope stoked. Sometimes the realization of four simple words, “We are not alone” can be the most powerful, most comforting, and sweetest words we can hear...the best present we can give. Wonderful post, my friend. Merry Christmas to you and your family!

How right you are, Eric. And also remember it's ok to ask for help. Like my friend's FB post - she made it easy for those to reach out. It's a scary thing to do. Many of us grew up thinking it was not ok to burden others with our troubles. Thank you for your thoughtful reply. Merry Christmas to you and your family as well. What a year!

Yes, I totally understand how scary reaching out for help can be. Thanks for the post!

Couldn't agree more. Thank you for writing this! Black Friday deals starting the night of Thanksgiving doesn't set a healthy precedent. Now more than ever we need generosity, graciousness and empathy.

So true, @voronoi. I'm grateful for all the like-minded friends I have made here on Steemit who share these same values!

Excellent post. I agree with everything you said. I just discovered your blog. Love your art. Followed