I woke up this morning feeling so down, thinking of how my life is currently going, how everyone seem to get all their acts together and how am moving to my next phase of late twenties in a few weeks and it get more overwhelming because each and everyone i come across as a lady commuting with a guy am not married to yet, seem to have an opinion on the kind of choice i choose both in a good and in a bad way respectively; forgetting they might be a reason and a clause making me to be in that kind of situation currently. So i was thinking what if i made a bad decision, what if my current situation is not an excuse, what if it actually enough reasons to be there, do i blame my myself or my families for this problems somehow.
Just somewhere along the line it brought me to my topic why we women feel the pressure of choosing financial stability in our acquitances over emotional stability and i begin to flash back on my life and it drawn on me what if i made the wrong decision my drastically choosing Mr.A over Mr.B, reality starts hitting and i started analyzing.
Mr.A obviously have more financial stability, as a paying source, a car and a apartment but he is not quite responsible,does not have a plan for a future,he is a cheat and a liar,he has a lot situationships in addition doesn’t seem like what i would be bold enough to take home to my parents, safe to say he doesn’t really have a purpose he is just well to do for his age but on the bright side Mr.A is always ready and willing to help me up when am down financially, he pays my rent, provisions and toiletries, he takes me out on dates, make me meet people in short he is a giver what we Yoruba calls “Afun ni ma wo be” meaning a giver that doesn’t look unto why.
Mr.B on the under hand also have a job but isn’t financially buoyant yet,does not have an apartment or a car yet safe to say he his still hustling but on a brighter side of being quite responsible, have a sense of responsibility,a listener who works hard to understand and see a point from everyones direction, very cheerful and a well known person. In addition he has plans working hand in hand with a promising future.
Moving forward after constrasting and comparing if there is a context on choosing, i feel if are to be realistic we will all agree that if am to safeguard myself financially i have to choose Mr.A cause he has those qualities but however Mr.B is very much realiable and will give much ease cause we are building together.
However,i compared few of my friends who had gone for someone like Mr.A which they’re still very much together and enjoying financial freedoms but all having there ups and downs because of what they settle for,after much analyzing i decided to go on with Mr.B which means i am securing my future right; at least i feel i am but the struggles became so real that the basics are taking a lot to acquire and it feels like am beneath all of my plans which is a reason for my deep thought.
What if i has gone for Mr.A and I regret it later?
What if i am with Mr.B and everything didn’t still get better?
What if i am with Mr.A and i don’t later regret it?
What if i am with Mr.B and things eventually became better?.
That is the thing about life, you can't have it all, but it's possible to be contented.
It's possible to have almost all too, but contentment is a virtue, especially when you don't have U wish for.
Mr A may provide for you and you may decide to live with his excesses.
Mr B may be there for U and you are not satisfied cos of his financial shortages or you become impatient with him.
What I feel is important is that you make a decision that given your current level of knowledge/wisdom after due diligence, you make the best choice. No one knows it all, and no one is immuned to mistakes.
The phrase "had I known" is designed to come at last, it can never come early.
That being said, make decisions that even if you have course to regret, you will know you actually made the best choice given your level of knowledge as at then.
My opinion though 😎
Thank you very much point clearly noted 😊
I think you are better off with B anyways. Cheaters are pieces of shit and should not be one to attempt a long term relationship. Never work with them.
B might be struggling right now but he’s, from what I can see in this very high level description, a more honest man. If he treats you right that’s the most important and he works so you also should not become a financial burden to him. Don’t spend money on stupid things like purses, shoes all that stuff. Yes you can get them here and there but there are so many more important things in life that should be where money is spent and saved. Dates are good but not every night or every weekend. Go do things that don’t cost money but allow you to spend time together. These are the important things in life.
Sure will thank you very much 😊