Minimal living isn't for everyone. Some people find it HARD to release "stuff", memorabilia, habits and both the physical and mental clutter in their orbit. They read some great book, LIKE the visual sense of order they derive from clean surfaces and minimal lines in some inspiring Pinterest image or a Hive blog they read. But 3 months later the clutter, the mess and the visual chaos creep back... they re-manifest.
What I've learned in my personal journey towards Minimalism is that our external world is an expression of our thought life, our beliefs, our values.
I've learned that I constantly need to evaluate, examine and question not only my bad habits, but the underlying beliefs which inform and shape my actions each day.
Photo by Sarah Dorweiler on Unsplash
If you're considering shifting towards a simpler physical existence, a smaller footprint and towards paring down and decluttering, there are some core values that I choose to deliberately engage with regularly, to help trim, shape, release and refine the physical world in which I am learning to thrive.
It is ALWAYS My Choice.
Someone gave it to me so I have to keep it. He'd be upset if I gave it away or passed it on. I can choose to believe it, or not. I can choose to regift it. I can choose to cherish the memory and release the physical gift that came with it. I can choose to believe Life is NOT about "stuff". I can choose to spend less time cleaning, polishing, dusting. I can choose to gift experiences and not just physical stuff. I can choose to redefine my reality.
Thoughts Become Things.
Bad memories can be contained in "stuff", just as much as good memories and feelings can, and so often the objects in our physical world contain energies which are not clear cut. My ambivalence about keeping an item tells me a lot, and will trigger the unclaimed but negative feeling every time I see something, whether I'm prepared to own that, or not. If in doubt, move it out. Seeing an item that reminds me daily of my growth, progress and thriving, also daily reinforces my good feelings about myself.
Failure Is a Measure of Growth.
We live largely in a black & white world. Good choices are a success, poor choices are a failure. Instead of seeing a no-longer-serves-me purchasing choice from 5 years ago as a failure (bad) and therefore needing to JUSTIFY the amount of money I wasted on that, it's FINE to reframe that thought, to pat yourself on the back for knowing why it wasn't to best choice, and to LET IT GO. And in the letting go, to celebrate the growth in yourself. I'm learning more, every day, to honour the "mistakes" which I choose to see as hallmarks of my evolution and growth.
The Tighter I Cling, The Slower Things Flow.
I'm not sure where we learned that the comfort of things always being the same meant that all was well. That changing jobs or partners was a sign of unhappiness or poor choices, of personal failure or a lack of character. I personally never congratulate people anymore on wedding anniversaries or long service in a job, because I choose to not honor nor reward the stuckness of others, nor their fear of change. It is NOT a virtue to keep something or someone for 50 years if it - or they - don't serve you. Staying in bad marriages, jobs, houses or countries that don't reflect our values as we grow often result in poor health. Why? I believe it's cos the FLOW in our lives stops when we grip something too tightly.
Release Always Comes Before Manifestation
Making space. When things feel tight or constrained in my world, when money stops moving or opportunities are slow to realize, I always look for what I can release. Whether it be old images on my computer that I no longer need to keep, unused items in my kitchen or wardrobe, or stale connections in my digital world, I make TIME to consider the energy of the things I cling to, and I make the choice to relax my fingers on my over-tight grip on some parts of my manifested world.
It never fails. Donated clothes or things, a few irritating online connections, a garden path trimmed and swept... it always ushers in something new. A gift, a new customer or opportunity, an invoice finally paid by a customer.
Minimal Living Means Owning & Living Your Values.
If what you see in your physical world doesn't resonate with where you think you'd like to be, then it's time to examine the unconscious beliefs that are holding you back from being your best self and living your best life.
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YES!! I feel like this every day. I have been thinking about minimal living since reading Marie Kondo's book and following her advice. I have decided to get rid of most of my clothes and shoes, my books and magazines, my art supplies and even my clothes hangers. I'm donating or giving away everything I don't use or want. I had to buy a whole new wardrobe after losing weight and I still have a ton of clothes I don't wear. I just felt like I needed to do this. Thanks for sharing your tesimonials and thoughts! 🌸
I seem to go in waves - there's a sharp crest of NEEDING to do a next-level clearing, followed by a kind of appreciating-pondering phase - sort of like a gardener wondering if she's pruned quite hard enough.
Glad you found benefit in the post. People losing weight is a tough one. Am always torn when I want to USEFULLY get rid of stuff but can't find a good rehoming option and don't want to contribute to the waste in the world.
I'm feeling a POST about this Minimalism conundrum may be burbling....
Hey there!
Your post made me teary-eyed. I wasn't sure what I would get when I put a topic out about values, but this post is so valuable to me. I wish I was inside your mind. You see the world in such a beautiful way.
This point in particular:
It took me a long time to acknowledge that.
When I first started dating my now husband, I remember going on a date in my favourite dress. I was at rock bottom in my life, and he hated seeing me that way. When I started feeling better, he said to me.
"You look beautiful in that dress, and I know it's your favourite and I like it too. But how about getting rid of that dress."
He explained to me that every time I see the dress it will take me back to a bad place. He was right. I got rid of that dress, and have used that principle since.
You are so wise 🤗🙌
Thanks for your #KISS
I enjoyed it 😉
lips sealed
Your husband is definitely intuitive and SMART. I actually burned all the photos from my second unhappy marriage. And kept ONE nice image of my then husband, from before we were married, the way I CHOOSE to remember him.
It's true that the memory ties of things - even our so-called favourites - are often unconscious... and that letting anything ambivalent go is a game changer.
Appreciating the good vibes - the fan clan application office is to yor right, down the hall, third door on the left. 😆
Thanks for creating some really thought provoking questions in this community. I'm trying to get back to my daily posting regime and intending to be more regular here. xxx
It's my pleasure, and I'm always impressed by the different views and words of wisdom shared. I do hope that you'll get back to regular blogging:)))
Lovely timing on the passing of past fails and present reminders, shedding, refining, transmuting, it's all on purpose. What will be will be, wi appreciate this nice read and reminder, to release, ahh the flow of simple living.. clearing space, day by day, appreciate your valuable words. Cheers M
I'm increasingly aware that the clearer, neutral spaces really do allow FLOW on all levels.
Home day today for the King's anniversary - looking around to see what more needs releasing and moving on.
Had some serious indicators of NEW & STRONGER FLOW already this week!!
Enjoying to see you back & active in the Hive.
Whaa which King? Man wi must have missed that, oh those respectful folk standing around am pm looking at reasons to obey, respectfully breathing consciousness towards taxed contributions to nvm nvm... breathing, tightens nuts, tickers towards the back of the shop, inaudible mumbling
YEsss.. strong flows and cold winds blow, let's fooking goo lasssy!!!
I am a minimalist when comparing myself to others, but I prefer not to do that. I have a few things that are valuable to me, otherwise, I am happy to walk away from most of them. Nothing ties me down... so I guess I am almost there! ;)
Interesting thought that "nothing ties me down" is your goal for minimalist living. I'm not sure it's my end goal. I've gotta THINK about this some more... and ponder... I'm not sure I actually have a goal, per se, other than to have the free, energetic space in my orbit available for more love, more abundance and more joy. I guess that IS a goal. 🤣 OK... probably no need to rethink that one. 😆
Agree with your 10000% that comparing yourself with others is really not helpful, most of the time.
If we made the choice to become more grounded in positive thoughts and set free what we are, then we liberate ourselves from unhealthy societal expectations and soar. The interesting but about our inner freedom is how in control we don't know we are of it.
You write so beautifully and this was a good perspective of life and all it is about :)
Thank you. I believe grounding deeply in our own values and purpose IS the secret to most everything. And from that all good things FLOW.
Looking forward to what you're sharing on the blockchain today.
Fantastic post :)
I especially love the paragraph on "failure" !!!
We've been programmed to think of it as such a negative thing, when it really is one of the best ways to learn what doesn't work and progress even more.
Solid values regardless of whatever lifestyle a person chooses ( ❤️ ) to live.
Thanks for such a positive response, @nickydee - following you from over here in Chiang Mai, Northern Thailand.
We have been PROGRAMMED in so many ways - we only really being to SEE & FEEL the results of that when we ponder our values and observe the dissonances and contrasts.
I think most people really only FEEL & LIVE their core values after they've been lived, tested and pruned. Then we OWN them.
Off to see what your last post was about... thanks for showing up!
dissonances - therein lies pretty much all the clues and keys :)
If only we were allowed to feel more. So many more of us would not get so very lost and waste so much precious time!
Your post was marvelous. Very happy to have "met" you. 👍
Hello from the Western Cape, South Africa. Once Cape Town but on the move looking for a maybe forever home...
Cape Town - a nice part of the world. I have a friend from Cape Town flying into Chiang Mai literally tomorrow. LOL... small world.
Gawd
Tell them to swing by and I'll carry their bags :)
I'll make it out there one day. It looks really beautiful too.
I really like your post. We don't always understand the value of questioning ourselves or re-framing our thoughts, clearing out the judgements we make of ourselves.
I never forget that my brain only have only one purpose. It exists to keep me alive. To do so it will subconsciously rebuild the environment I survived in before because it sees it as safe. No matter what I suffer in that environment, I am alive and my brain assumes the environment was a major contributor to that.
Even your pattern of thought supports rebuilding what kept you alive before.
The only way to reprogram your brain to accept your new environment is to question your thoughts and re-framing your ideas realistically.
Anyway, I talk too much. Loved your post.
There's no such thing as talking too much, esp on Hive. 😆
I believe this life is all about learning to make better choices, conscious choices. And yes, if we don't, the negative, conditioned patterns persist.
Appreciating your support so much!
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Hehe, better late than never @artemislives 👍
Funny confession - I often chuck things or take them to the oppie and I have to hide it from Jamie (and previously my son). I'd have to deal with the questions: 'why are you getting rid of that?' etc. But if I do it secretly, they don't know and don't even miss it! And if they say 'what happened to that 'thing'', I can shrug and say 'Oh, I took it to the oppie years aggo, didnt' you notice' or 'don't know, it's around somewhere' and they don't think about it again ever. #secretminimalist