As we get older, we tend to take life more seriously. It's almost as if the fun ends in childhood. That's not entirely true, I think. I believe that children have their worries for their level, and they may experience pain parallel to their comprehension.
Is there a remedy for pain? Not permanently there isn't, as we all know. That is why some people pray for the promises of their religious beliefs to come to fruition; eg, Christians pray that "Thy kingdom come"
In the meantime though, we can only drift for a while so the pain does not consume us.
MUSIC AS A REMEDY FOR PAIN
When i was little, i could not understand why in my tradition, people play music and dance at burials. Over here, if the deceased died at a good age(70+) they don't just hold a funeral service. We could have as much as a week or more for burial ceremony and rituals, in which music is heavily associated.
The last one I attended was last Thursday. We travelled over a 100 miles, through land and river to get to the host community- 'Torugbene', Delta state.
We arrived at noon, just before the intermission. Most of our company, mostly family members, travelled back home afterwards. I stayed back back for an adventure and experience that was much needed(funny right?)
Most of the jetties were made of 3/4 or 4/4(inches) column members which were driven into the earth, while any suitable dimension wood was used in other parts of these structures. Bamboos were used for flooring and walls.
Music and Dance Dance Dance!!!
After the intermission, some of my cousins and I sat in front of a small shop. We drank, ate and had a million conversations together, passing time till about 11:00 pm when we started to hear the music from the outdoor event center of the compound. Families are grouped into different compounds in these settlements, and they all have an outdoor center where occasions like these are held.
Burials here are a celebration of life, and as such, they are filled with joy enough to overwhelm any sorrow, for nearly all. I will now walk you through my time there, the highlight of the time being a musical performance by the Living legend of the Izon Nation- Mr 'Izon-Ibe', that ensued the first night after the Funeral service. He's the person with the red guitar and the other musicians are his band, i can't think of a single day that they haven't had to perform somewhere. Wherever he goes, you will definitely see a lot of women do this traditionally dance that looks like an ancient version of ‘twerking’, it has many variants and styles to it, and you would often see men dance in a similar way with passionate expressions.
The three minute video below is a combination of smaller clips that show my experience from the boat trip to the party at night. I also took the liberty to add a distinct clip at the end from a past occasion where Mr Izon-Ibe and his band shook the dance floor with another one of his famous performances. At places like these, people who dance really well are sprayed with money in appreciation for the life they bring to the party. Dancing is a core part of the Izon culture.
Everything comes to an end
We turned in for the night by 4:00am. Too exhausted to be picky, we slept wherever there was a not-so-hard surface, mostly sofas and couches in a local house reserved for us, it was a decent duplex. Those who left the party earlier got to sleep on a bed, I wasn't one of them. By the next morning we were ready to leave at 9:am.
There were three private cars available. Apparently, there was a way back home that did not require boat travel, so all twelve of us hoped into three cars and started the 100mile journey back to Yenagoa, Bayelsa state.
On our way back we made a few stops to buy food items like oil, Garri(a local cassava based meal), plantains, crayfishe, and fried maggots(yeah, that’s what I said), and they’re very tasty too.
Here are some photos I took for your viewing pleasure :)
Yes, they are alive
These ones are fried, but are often eaten alive with some add-ons
In this journey, I was reminded of the power of music over emotions and reality. People were able to turn pain into celebration using the right toolset of which music is integral. An example to demonstrate that indeed when life happens, music saves.
The next time you feel sad, don’t forget to listen to some music.
Music is like medicine , so be sure that you’re taking the appropriate kind for what you need to be positively inspired
▶️ 3Speak
I can relate to this
Tribes like the Igbo tribe in the eastern part of Nigeria are very similar
I'm not very familiar with Igbo culture, I am very curious though
Wow!
You have brought here a completely new culture to me, all all all.
First of all, burials in my country are not celebrated in this way. They are associated with a sad event and no music is there present. The family members even try not to listen to any music or allow themselves any kind of entertainment after that. Women (the elder generations) wear black if I am not mistaken for at least 40 days, or even a year, or more.
I see that your tradition is completely different. Although it is sad even to lose someone, people try to turn the sadness into a celebration? Much better!
But all those colours, food, music, it is completely a different world to me! So colourful!!! 🙌
The dresses that the women wear and the decoration on the heads, how cool.
ANd the style of dancing! I have never seen it! Thank you for this experience @almostsober
P.S. Although I see why you have titled your post in the same way as I, maybe it would be good to slightly vary it?? :D
people might think it is the same post if dont open it, or if anyone else wants to write a similar post that they should title it this way... so to avoid it. I hope you understand my request :))
However, I do like your whole post and your creativity, it was cool (plus the food stands and the maggots... Uhm... is it common to consume them? How do they taste ?)
Extremist behavior 😂….
We are only sad and don’t celebrate when the death is premature. In some cultures here, wives of deceased have to scrape off their hair. In mine, it is optional for anyone who wishes to honor the dead.
Yes, the maggots are very tasty. A most sort after delicacy even. People who travel to these riverine settlements travel with these maggots in mind. They can be found in fallen palm trees. They are commonly called Bayelsa suya(suya means bbq), Bayelsa is the name of my state. It is very commonly eaten😁
And yeah, those are traditional attires. People wear them to church, traditional occasions, weddings. Where I’m from, people have traditional and church weddings, where in the traditional one, the bride is adorned in a similar but more glorious attire. That headtie is a trademark attire of the Izon tribe.
Sorry about the title, I had assumed it to be a prompt. This is literally the only community I write in since it’s music related and I’m not much of a writer, so I’ve treated your post as a prompt here. I have taken note of the error though.
Yes, you are right, that behaviour is more marked if the death is unexpected. Well, no death is expected.
Maggots as a delicacy. I imagine they are, it is just that we are not used to consuming it, but I truly believe if someone travels to those settlements, all the specialities should be tried. It is an experience!
I have learned so much from your post, as I said it showed a completely different scenery so once again, thank you a lot!
Title of post - thank you for acting so quickly and changing it :)
And I am so glad you found a good home in this community, I hope at least that you feel welcome. We try to save it as a place for exactly this type of posts, containing a personal story connected to music. We hope we will slowly bring more prompts and challenges and all :)))
I've actually learned a lot from this because interestingly enough I have never been to a proper Ijaw burial, everything looks fascinating to me.
Try to attend next time the opportunity comes your way. That didn’t just sound wrong, life sucks… basically
😆 I probably wouldn't, I don't it's point but it was good learning about it and seeing it.
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This was a very insightful post.
I had a lot to learn by just reading the activities that took place for the funeral rites.
However, something I have always found unsettling is the maggot.
I just can't get out of my head and give it a chance.
On my trips to visit my family in Bayelsa, I see they sell them on the road but I am so scared to try it out.
I also heard it is rich in proteins. That's interesting!
🤣🤣🤣
You should really try them, they’re very tasty. Best to have them with bread and soda or just in your soup. The head is crunchy too. They are mostly fried before eaten so it’s not nasty at all, just heavenly delight in a lifeless maggot.
I see.
Such a wonderful (maybe not the right word in such circumstances) to bury someone. I always say to my friends, I like you all to party when I die since life shall be celebrated. However, most peeps in my country don't feel the music, or a party not appropriate. I think they can learn from your culture. Maybe you shall come to my country and show all citizens how it can be done. Btw, my condolences.
Nah, it’s fine. The person died in her late 80s. We celebrate people like that here.
I would relish the opportunity to show em how it’s done in Africa… maybe if I relocate or just travel for studies some time in the future :)
This is fascinating - it's really interesting to hear how you view and experience death. I live in the United States, and death is treated very differently here! As a lifelong musician, your way of celebrating life as a way to honor the dead is really appealing to me. Very beautiful!
I am glad that you found it interesting. I see on TV when you guys mourn your dead in black, I really wonder why something so inevitable should be treated that way, especially when the person live a pretty long life. It makes me appreciate the diversity in culture worldwide. This is our heritage, and i am happy to share with you, since i already know yours in this respect.