Do you think you can control your life? And if you could, would you really want to? Don't be so sure, and here's why.

• What is "control" and is there a free will in the world, for us, human beings?
• Is it good or bad? In other words, would we want to have free will?
• Personally, what's my take on feeling the control in my life?

Credit: Sofia Bonati

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Free will for all?

A year ago I posted an article about control. Here's one quote from it:

"As for one, regrettably, I have found out that the human doesn't have much of a saying. I say regrettably because there have been times when I wished I hadn't had to deal with the freedom issue. So for me, it's not a choice actually (some of you may argue and say that everything is a choice, and that could be an interesting discussion that I will save for another time)."

What do we mean when we speak about "control"? We do have a say regarding the mundane things in life. What to wear when we wake up, how many eggs to eat for breakfast, in which road to go to school/job and how much to spend on a Christmas present to a close neighbor. Does having such options in life mean we have control over it? I guess most of you would say no because those choices don't really make us feel free, do they? It doesn't really matter to us how our daily routine unfolds. Rather, we care about the essence, the long term meaning in our existence on this planet.

So, control for most of the readers of this post means having the ability to direct our life in a way that would be more enriching, satisfying, gratifying, and fulfilling. Control over how we manage our life in accordance with our value-fulfillment.

I first came across that term in the spiritual manuscripts by the 1970s author Jane Roberts. There, it was stated that Value-Fulfilment is a set of merits or values with which each person is born, and upon completing them, they fulfill the master-plan of their lives.

So back to the basic - Do I feel I have control over my value-fulfillment? And before I address my emotional take on the control issue, I still want to answer the first question I posed above, and now in the true meaning of control, i.e, value-fulfillment.

The human does have control over their life. The examples above demonstrate it very well. However, being able to change the daily activities has little effect on the value-fulfillment, if any at all. The master, on the other hand, has no control whatsoever over life. Yes, you read me right. We are born with a preplanned scheme, set with values to fulfill, and doted with milestones along the way that would help us to fulfill those values. The magic is that no matter how much we would try to escape that fulfillment, we still would be pulled back, time and again, to the route that leads to an epiphany.

Credit: UK design studio Universal Everything

Is it good or bad? Do we want free will?

Tough one, and again, I have to address this issue from both points of view, the human and the master. As a child and an adolescent, if I was given the liberty to choose my life, to have control over it, I'd, naturally, ask for money, fame, love, and health. Actually, there was a time when I still thought I had control over my life, that I was harnessing all my human-super-powers to manifest all those. Luckily, though, I failed. Miserably.

There is a phrase I once coined -

"Humans who have dreams in life are lucky.
Those who see their dreams shattered are luckier".

Therefore, having control over our life means, for me, that we are still humans, that we still live our life from the cage of our mind, with its limited perspective of what is possible, of the duality, of the limited and often fearful ego. Only when we tap into our mastery, only when we know the wisdom of our aspects and lifetimes, we realize how futile the control is, and how resisting our value-fulfillment, to any degree, is actually children who play in a sandbox and think they are the rulers of the world.

I don't believe that there is something bad or wrong in having control. There are times in our lives when we need to live on/within a sandbox and feel we have a say on what's going on in our infantile kingdom. It's important though to be aware of our position. It's also important not to be slaves forever. Meaning, if there are times in our life when we are adamant to control, that's fine. We have our reasons, but at some point we must release that control.

Growing up is the wisdom to adhere to a broader perspective and release the grip on life, the ancient one we have been so long brainwashed to firmly hold.

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Credit: Oliver Kreylos

Do I personally feel I have control over my life? The Sandbox parable

Nowadays, each time my mind is trying to predict or project or direct the future, I smile and put it back to its rightful place. We play together the parent-child game. At first, it rebelled, refused to lose its all-encompassing role as the ruler of the seven kingdoms. My mind was persistent in convincing me that it could get me love, health, abundance, and fame. At first, I joined its game in the sandbox. Together with other humans we played, laughed, experienced and created. Once in a while a grown-up came and turned the sandbox upside down, destroying all my mind's creations.

When I confronted my mind - "all the love, fame and abundance you promised me went down the drain", it felt confused for a while but soon regained its sense and promised me that next time he would build them stronger, if I only let him continue to play in the sandbox.

After three or four such cycles I got fed up of this roller-coaster. I bid my mind farewell, gave it the sandbox kingdom to rule, a role he has been enjoying very much and has done rather efficiently, and went on toward mastery.

How much control do I feel I have over my life? A lot. But I make sure I have this control only in one issue - the choice of the path of Realization. And if I feel I am controlling other aspects of my human life then I immediately catch myself - my mind - and release the grip.

So you see, I do not want to have control over my life!

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Creating one's own reality" is relevant only for one's little human Self; the Master surrenders their free will to the presence of the I AM.

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