Self-destruction

in OCD5 years ago

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Yes, I'm still not done with this painting despite only having a few steps left. I don't know, I feel exhausted with life in general. Often times I sleep for more than 8 hours a day and my sleep schedule has changed. I will have very low energy some days and very high energy on other days like a rollercoaster.




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I'm on this part now where I call the process "self-destruction". Like I carelessly scratch paint everywhere, not worrying if it looks good or not. Just losing myself or something. I recorded a video and you'll see there how I almost throw my brush just to get this agitated or angry brush strokes.





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I do think it's quite boring for my paintings to have a relaxed brush strokes like this one. I love having contrast in my painting. It shows how moody I could be for some days.





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Based on the process that you have seen, do you have your own interpretations of the painting so far? Does it move you in any way or is there anything that you would like to see? :D

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There she is! It's not your wok without those. <3

True lol. I think there's always missing when I don't do those. xD

Hiddenblade's signature that is! ;) <3

Nice painting! I always loved this kind of art since it seems like the most powerful way of sharing a story or message - and I personally feel like it's about a sad moment of life when there are still things trying to keep you in the past and not let you enjoy and see the beauty of the present "_"

That is so accurate! Glad you got it even though it's not even finished yet! It revolves around the same concept, but just different wording. Thanks for the interpretation. :D

Can't wait to see the whole masterpiece when it's finished! :)

It reminded me of Numb (linkin park) music video.

Haha yeah I'm like that artist when I do my work sometimes (where it becomes too emotional).

Yes we're all in a moment feeling so tired and exhausted even eating cost us more energy instead of giving us energy, otherwise it is a great period where we discover a new univers inside us the pain motivate and awake our artistic side it is a pleasure from a royal kind.
By the way i adore the deepens in your paintings.

I agree! I am having that moment where eating is exhausting lol. I surely learned a lot during my dark times. Thank you!

Are you painting over a print?

No, I am painting over my painting. :D

We all go through that situation, where you don't feel like doing anything. I think meditation will help because it does wonders for me.

I have tried doing meditation but most of the time I don't have the time for it as I'm always sleepy lol. Glad it's working for you! :D Will definitely do that when I'm able to settle down or probably when I'm finished with these paintings. :)

nice one, i like it

Thank you! :D

I'm not good in expressing painting but one thing I noticed. It's about sadness what the paintor wanted to express. No one can understand him and no one wants to to understand.

I'm happy you've seen the sadness. Thank you! :D

hello
I just came across your blog for the first time. You and your painting have a lot of beauty and emotion. Fascinating! I shall be following you to see what is next and shall enjoy getting to know you a little through your blogs.

Thank you! Will do the same ^^

Art is the revelation of your inner world! You are talented!

Thank you! I've always think art is an extension of ourselves. It just depends on the artist on how much he/she wants to show to others. :D

Uhhh this looks interesting. You know what? I would mess around even more, I have a feeling this is only the beginning. That yellow shadow looks nice

I will! Thank you :D

I wasn't able to access your video @hiddenblade but after viewing your creative process above (plus your mood as you paint) I wonder if your art represents the fact that you are trying release some kind of inner turmoil but a part of you wants to keep these thoughts hidden for fear of rejection?

You wouldn't be alone if this was the case but the very fact that you have begun the process is very positive. The beauty about the process of creating brings freedom, release, stimulation, inspiration and so much more.

Some people use words, whether spoken or written for its cathartic value, artists do the same without realizing it at times. If we treat our art as the gift that it is, we are blessed indeed. 🎨 🌼 💝