Finding my voice.

in The Ink Well7 months ago (edited)

The English teacher was running late and while my classmates gallivanted, I chose to finish up the story I'd been writing for weeks. I love to create intriguing worlds from my head. My book was my safe haven.

The tap on the desk from the class prefect alerted me to the arrival of a teacher. I raised my head to find the English teacher standing at the front of the class. She looked so lovely dressed in black pants and a blue t-shirt. Her flawless black skin radiated natural beauty. Even without make-up on, she could easily grace the cover of any magazine or billboard.

"Good day everyone!” she greeted with a smile so warm it could melt the coldest heart. “Sorry for being late: the director had an emergency meeting with the teachers,” she explained. "Now that I am here, let's get to studying. Please bring out your notebooks."

For thirty minutes, she taught about passive voice. At the end of the class, she assigned classwork to be answered and submitted immediately. The classwork was easy and I was done in less than five minutes. Confidently, I sauntered to her table with my book in my hand.

"I am done with the classwork ma'am." I announced.

She studied me with a keen eye for a moment and I felt as if she was boring a hole through me. Ms. Mary had never looked at me in such a manner.

"Faith, there is something I wish to discuss with you. Kindly wait behind at the sound of the bell."

My heart skipped a beat. I wondered if I had done anything wrong. With wide and curious eyes, I searched her face for any clues of anger or disappointment but instead I found her lips curved in a smile.

"I can see my request has you perturbed.” She began, her smile widening. “I guess I'd rather tell you now. You are aware that your class has been paired to debate against the 14th grade students. I've seen your work and how you articulate your thoughts on paper. I want you to represent the class in the upcoming debate competition."

My book slipped from my hand and fell to the floor. I bent down to pick it up. I swallowed the lump that had suddenly formed in my throat and stood back up. I looked at her and her eyes were still on me.

"Ms. Mary, I... I can’t speak in front of people. I get too nervous. I'm sorry but I can't do this ma'am. I just can't." I explained with a trembling voice.

"That’s exactly why I chose you," She said, her smile warming further. She stood up from her desk and approached me. "You are a star that needs to shine, Faith. You have so much to offer, and it’s time others saw that too. You will be representing your class. Okay?"

My brilliance had never been in question but it was in written words and not spoken words. Still I nodded and handed my book to her. How do I say no to a woman I had grown to love and admire? That night at bedtime, I asked my mother out of the blues, "Do you think education is a waste of time?"

The question took her by surprise and she inquired to know why I would ask such a thing. I explained that I had been chosen to represent my class in a school debate and that was the topic we were assigned to argue.

"My teacher thinks I am a star and I can deliver." I added hoping to make some sense.

"Your teacher believes in you and so do I.” She reassured me. “Stand infront of the mirror and see how brightly you shine" With these encouraging words, she turned off the light and wished me goodnight.

From that night onward I practiced diligently. Every night, I never failed to stand in front of the mirror and say words of affirmation to myself.

The day finally arrived and the atmosphere in the school auditorium was electric, parked with students and teachers. The stage was set, and after the moderator's welcoming words and a series of entertaining performances, it was time for the debate. The student from grade 14 climbed the stage and delivered a compelling argument earning approving nods and looks of conviction on people's faces.She ended and was met with a round of applause. I felt a twinge of nervousness watching it. How do I possibly top this performance?

My name reverberated through the auditorium’s sound system signaling it was my turn to climb the stage. A flurry of nervous butterflies erupted within me. My stomach churned and for a moment, I wished I had never accepted to do this. I raised my head and scanned the room and found my teacher's eyes. She smiled at me and mouthed "Go on! You can do this."

I took a deep breath and stood from my seat. I rubbed my sweaty palms against my school uniform in an attempt to dry them. I reached the microphone and tried to speak but my voice came out as barely a whisper. For a moment I feared I might lose control.

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I looked at Ms.Mary and the smile had not left her face. She gave me an encouraging thumbs up. I closed my eyes and repeated to myself "You are a star and you need to let people see how brightly you shine". I said it three times and blew some air through my mouth to calm my nerves. I opened my eyes and approached the microphone once more and started all over again.

"Good morning panel of judges, accurate time keeper and my fellow debater. My name is Faith David and I'm here to oppose the motion that states ‘Education is a waste of time.’”

As the words flowed from my mouth, I found my confidence growing. Little by little, my voice steadied. Soon I was moving around the stage and gesturing to add weight to my words. The points I had meticulously prepared poured out effortlessly, like a river through a dam.

I concluded five minutes later to a round of applause and a standing ovation. My heart was pounding heavily in my chest with a mix of adrenaline and disbelief. I couldn't believe I had actually done it. I stood there and allowed myself soak in the cheers and shouts from the students.

Ms. Mary was the first to reach me on the stage. Her eyes were shining with pride. She hugged me tightly almost suffocating me in her embrace and exclaimed, “You did it! You made me so proud."

"We did it ma'am." I responded after she finally released me from her embrace "You helped me find my voice. Thank you for believing in me".

"It's all you. You did this.” She reaffirmed.

Soon the stage was bustling with my classmates hugging, shouting and celebrating around me. It's not everyday you find a 12th grader outshining a 14th grader in such a public and impressive manner.

That day marked a turning point in my life. I began representing my class and even my school in various activities because of my standout performance. With every outing, I got better until I became a star whose light will never be dimmed.

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What an encouraging piece from a snippet of your life that you've shared with us. There was always a point in our lives where we all had to face our fears and I'm glad you scaled through yours in glee. You had an amazing teacher. I feel she's part of those people we all need to bring out the best in us. You were lucky to have had her. Great read!!

Yes I have an amazing teacher. She was a pillar of strength and support and she really helped me to build my confidence. Thank you so much for stopping by.

Usually the hardest part is the start of anything. But yes when you speak, once you start it gets easier and easier! Well done Faith David 😁

You can say that again. It's always hardest at the beginning but eventually everything falls into place. Thank you so much for stopping by.

I'm glad you found out what your teacher and mom already knew - and I'm glad you found Hive and are sharing your voice here, too :)

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This is the sort of narrative from which readers can take inspiration. You were not confident, but found that confidence because others believed in you. Achievement rarely comes easily. In your case, it took determination and courage.

You describe your feelings well. You show us how nervous you were. A great example of showing and not telling.

Thank you for sharing this with us, @zyzymena.

Thank you very much @theinkwell

I had a similar experience, I am glad I took the bold step instead of running away.

That's the best way. Always conquer your fears but only on so doing can you know the potentials that lies within.

What a great story of overcoming, confidence and encouragement. Your teacher gave you a wonderful opportunity, a challenge that you took on responsibly and also enjoyed it, that was the best part.

I loved it, thank you so much @zyzymena for sharing your story.