Understanding Concepts.

Ivan Samkov

Growing up as a child, there were many funny aspects of my life. Interesting ones as well, and looking back at most of them just brings a wild smile to my face.

I had to grow up fast as my elder sisters went to the boarding house and I was stuck as the only child at home. I had to think ahead of my age and I also did so many things children my age couldn't do like washing cars, and fixing things in general.

There were rough parts also when my grandma would show up at the house and start making trouble with my mum for not giving birth to a male child. I would always cry when I'd see her throwing abusive words at my mother and sometimes my mum would cry also and sometimes, she would spend the night thinking. Situations like this made me stronger and contributed in making me grow faster.

A particular event which I could never forget of me growing up as a child happened when I was nine. A neighbor of mine, David was an atheist and him being one had a great impact in my life.

While my family and I go to church on Sundays, I always see David at home and despite the fact that his family are christians, he refuses to go to church. Being a bold child, I questioned him and he told me that he didn't believe in the metaphorical beliefs of Christ. I wondered what that meant and asked my sister about it.

She didn't understand at first but when I told her it was our neighbor David that told me, she then told me he was an atheist. That was my first time hearing the word and I felt so intrigued by it and so I went back to David to ask him all about it.

David told me his story on how he became an atheist. His story was similar to mine. His grandma was always disturbing his mother for not giving birth to another child after him. But what was just different in his case was that his father was in support and it caused a major break in his family. His father threw him and his mother out of the house and his mother suffered so much that they almost ate sand on the streets. He felt if there was actually a God, all these wouldn't have happened to them and from then on, he never believed in God. His mother later found another man and got married to him and that was how their lives were better.

Hearing his story really touched my heart. And I wondered why someone who doesn't even believe in God is so rich and successful. He was an ambassador for different products and a model also. He would also travel to different places for shoots and other things.

I started questioning certain things happening in the church. Even preaching in church now sounded somehow to me and I always had an opposing question to everything being said. Was there truly a God? I would question myself.

But then, while growing, I came to realize that there are some mysteries that are better left mysteries. God is a supernatural being who alone exists as himself and is infinite in all things. That alone is okay for me to understand. I don't need anything more.