Hello @quan45. Please clarify if this is fiction (not real), or nonfiction (it really happened). Your tags are confusing. One says creative fiction and one says fiction writing. Yet, this piece reads like nonfiction. Once you clarify, we can curate your story. Please do so quickly, because curation is on the clock.
I'm so sorry for the mixed up....
Thanks for the correction.
Have made the necessary corrections.