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RE: Haunted By A Near Pile-Up

in The Ink Welllast year (edited)

The thought of how close we have been to tragedy can be very unsettling. How fortunate that your dad was diligent and had great awareness of his surroundings. When writing creative non-fiction, bear in mind that it should exhibit the finest attributes of good fiction. A couple of tips for you: In this story there are a number of unrelated threads that have no relevance to the ultimate theme which is one of escaping a tragic outcome. You introduce the family business, and a conflict with your father over school but neither of these threads are developed any further and neither contribute to escaping the near tragedy. It leaves the reader wondering why they are mentioned. It would have elevated your story if you had related these legs of the story to the moment of poor judgment (cause and effect) or instead focused more on the car racing by and the moment of realisation of how close tragedy was, how it felt before, during, and after. Show us how bad you felt using descriptions involving the senses, body language, and facial expressions, rather than telling us that you felt bad. It will allow the reader to connect more closely with the emotion and have empathy for your characters. Show don't tell takes flat two-dimensional characters and lifts them off the page, and with it stories come to life. Check out this Ink Well article for guidance.

Show don't tell

Thank you for sharing a story from your life with The Ink Well.

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Thanks @theinkwell for your corrections. They are duly noted. I will also check out the link as well. Thanks for stopping by.