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RE: Two stories (part 1) the ink well

in The Ink Welllast year (edited)

Hello @abdur1,

Thank you for publishing a story with the Inkwell once again. You apparently like to write...that comes through in your story. However, you are new to this community and therefore should understand some aspects of publishing here.

One of the most important points to remember is that we don't accept serials, or chapters. Each story must stand on its own and be complete, on its own. This story, for example, could have ended with this paragraph:

He said to the tiger, listen, tiger brother, the dance I was doing above was not right at all. I realized that it was evil so I came down to seek your forgiveness. sorry brother

This would have been a complete story, especially if you added a line about how the tiger responded to the monkey's statement. Did the tiger eat the monkey? Did the tiger forgive the monkey? That story would have a beginning, a middle and an end, what we call an arc.

When you add the last paragraph:

Once five college friends planned that they would travel by train. Like talk like action. Five of them bought tickets and boarded a train. The carriage they boarded was full of passengers. Everyone was sitting quietly enjoying the train journey.

You have begun another complete story. Obviously, from your title, this will be part II. However, we don't publish part IIs. So the story would have to end with the monkey line.

Finally, and this is an important point for any story you write anywhere, these lines:

Even in our society there are certain people who enjoy seeing the danger of others. Laughing, joking and having fun. But it is not desirable at all. Anyone can be in danger at any time. Dangers and accidents never come. Good people, bad people, whoever is in danger, if I can't help, at least I won't laugh and joke. Because it is impossible to say that we can also face that danger or even worse danger at any time.

Do not belong in a story. They are what is known as moralizing. There are referred to as 'author intrusion'. When the author speaks directly to the reader like that, it breaks the narrative stream. If you have a moral to express in your story, it should be expressed by one of the characters.

This story has good potential, but because it is part I of a two-part series we cannot curate highly. We look forward to reading more from you. It is our pleasure to encourage writers and to help them develop their writing skills.

Thank you!

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I will try hard to follow your instructions, thank you very much.