'Good afternoon, can you help me check my bills immediately,' the gentleman who had just rushed to the front of the queue said.
'Hello, can't you see there's a queue, what's your problem', Evelyn replied
Ignoring her, he turned back to the cashier, 'you really need to help me please, it's urgent'.
'I'm sorry sir, I can't. You need to plead with the lady who I'm meant to attend, unless she agrees, I can't attend to you, the cashier said.
He turns again to Evelyn and pleads with her and finally agrees.
Evelyn was working in a bank and had just been transferred to the bank's new branch in another town and was staying at her friend's Amanda.
She had gone to work and at the close of work , she had gone to the car park to drive out, only to realize another car was blocking her. She was wondering who it was when a fine gentleman dressed in a perfectly fitted suit stepped out of the car. His height, handsomeness and hair were a perfect blend. She was lost, admiring him.
I'm so sorry, I'd drive out soon, he said.
It was you from the mall yesterday right? He asked.
I'm Felix, he said stretching out hands for a handshake.
Evelyn, she replied.
I'm sorry about yesterday but can I please get your number so we could be talking as friends, Felix asked.
In affirmation, she gave him her number.
This was the beginning of a beautiful friendship as the duo would hang out together, visit each other and spend time knowing each other.
Felix had told his brother, Jude about his new friend who made him happy.
Jude's fiancee had been transferred and in a bid to support her, he decided to join her in the new town since he could do his business from anywhere. His fiancee was Evelyn, Felix's new mystery friend. It was a great shock to Felix when Jude brought her home and introduced her as his fiancee. He knew then, his friendship was about to end. Jude had a weakness of paying so much attention to his work as he was always on his phones or laptops paying little or no attention to Evelyn. Although she had complained bitterly about this, nothing still changed rather he would ask his younger brother Felix to accompany her each time she needed to hang out. She was tired of this because it seemed like she was in a relationship with two brothers. Felix never stopped trying his best in making her happy while talking to his brother who was really stubborn.
The last straw that broke the camels back was when he forgot her birthday, this was really hurting to her and when he finally remembered, he pleaded and opted to take her for a dinner but once again he stood her up with no prior notice. She cried bitterly and remained in her shadow throughout the night.
'This has always happened for 4 years now, since we started dating and rather than getting better, it's worse by the day, she kept crying and as usual, Felix was there for her.
When Jude returned, Felix scolded him for his actions but he made it clear that it was his job before anything or anyone else.
'Evelyn would be a distraction, I detest poverty and she needs to understand that my business alot,' he stated.
This brought to an end a beautiful 4 years relationship as Evelyn could no longer bear the emotional damage of being ignored.
What do they say, a broken relationship is better than a broken marriage.
But Felix had gotten emotionally attached to Evelyn. Everyday he spent with her doubled his emotions although he never attempted cheating on his brother. But now they had ended things, he opened up to his brother who stated his disappoint but eventually gave his blessings to the love birds.
THE END
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Your story shares the complexity of relationships, and that it can get especially complicated when two people love the same person. But Felix acted with integrity and did not try to steal her away. Nice job with the character development. The two brothers have very distinct personalities.
We have some feedback for you. You can make your stories easier to read by adding spaces in between each paragraph. We also have some great resources for developing writers in our catalog of fiction writing tips.
You might benefit from the article called Help for the Grammatically Challenged, which provides important tips on how to use Google Docs to draft your stories. It will point out errors that need to be fixed, and you can fix them by clicking on them. You can then copy the content from Google Docs and paste it into your post on Hive. It's a great way to improve your story's quality. Good luck and keep writing.
Thank you
Very well noted