The nights are getting colder and colder, which may only be an illusion, but no, because enduring them was getting harder and harder.
I opened my eyes and realized that I had rested very little the night before, I woke up somewhat tired and with the feeling of having had an incredible dream. It was time to start another day, back to that monotony that suffocated me so much, back to that job which I once saw as the perfect opportunity to grow and now I only see it as a place that consumes much of my time and does not give me enough to live.
To wake up again and go to the kitchen next to that same cat that every morning asks me for food, and get up to see through the window that endless traffic that day after day is there, waiting for me to join it, wait.... Today there was no traffic.
I got ready to go to work, and even if I was not in the mood I had no other choice, after all that was what I built, that was the dream I longed for.
As I went down the elevator I imagined myself calm, not in a specific place, since any other place would be better than being there. I visualized myself alone, without the pressure of everyday life. A series of images passed through my mind, but I could not find one that gave me fulfillment.
Arriving at the door of the building as every day, I could see that the traffic was scarce, which was very strange to me, and this would make it difficult to stop a cab, so the best thing to do was to cross the street to wait for the first transport I could find.
The lack of traffic generated a little more tranquility, less noise, less smoke. I could enjoy the peace.
I put on my headphones and decided to start my way, but when I was halfway across the street I could not notice the approaching car, I only felt a push and how my head hit the pavement. After that everything was black, I had the sensation of being in the air, that my body no longer belonged to me, fear invaded me and although I tried to feel my limbs I could not achieve it. Then a loud crackling sound was repeated in my mind, at that moment I could not locate where it was up and where it was down, only the constant repetition of it. I did not know if my body still existed, I did not feel my hands and then the feeling of pressure in my head started as if it was being squeezed, right there everything was over, at that moment everything calmed down and everything had stopped, but some confused voices started, I could not determine what they were saying, nor could I feel my hands to cover my ears and little by little they increased, more and more, I started to feel that my head was going to explode, that my breathing had started to become difficult, but how is it possible if I could not feel my body. When the whispers had turned into screams I tried to open my eyes but I didn't know how to do it, my body no longer belonged to me, for a moment everything calmed down, and right there I could open my eyes.
Maybe it was just a dream, or maybe not, but I was in my room again. If it was a dream, I can say that it was the most realistic dream I have ever had in my whole life. Again, right on time, I had to go to work, that feeling of reality I couldn't get it out of my head. My hands were shaking, I just wanted an answer, but I knew getting one was impossible, the best thing to do would be to distract myself, so I went for a cup of coffee and a cigarette, to start my day, and get back to reality. As I stepped out onto the balcony I couldn't help but spill my coffee.... There was no traffic today.
Thank you for reading
Traducción al español
Las noches cada vez son más frías, lo cual puede ser solamente una ilusión, pero no, porque soportarlas cada vez era más difícil.
Abrí los ojos y me di cuenta que había descansado muy poco la noche anterior, me desperté algo cansado y con la sensación de haber tenido un sueño increíble. Era hora de iniciar otro día más, volver a esa monotonía que tanto me asfixiaba, volver a ese trabajo el cual una vez lo ví como la oportunidad perfecta para crecer y ahora solo veo como ese lugar que consume gran parte de mi tiempo y que no me da lo suficiente como para vivir.
Volver a despertar e ir a la cocina junto a ese mismo gato que cada mañana me pide comida, y levantarme para ver por la ventana ese tráfico interminable que día a día está alli, esperando para que me una a el, espera... Hoy no había tráfico.
Me aliste para ir a trabajar, y aunque no tuviese ánimo no tenía ninguna otra opción, al fin y al cabo eso fue lo que construi, ese fue el sueño que tanto anhelaba.
Mientras bajaba el ascensor me imaginaba tranquilo, no en un lugar específico, ya que cualquier otro sería mejor que estar alli. Me visualizaba solo, sin la presión del día a día. Por mi mente pasaban una serie de imagenes, pero no lograba encontrar una que me diera plenitud.
Al llegar a la puerta del edificio como todos los días, pude ver qué el tráfico era escaso, lo cual me resultó muy raro, y esto dificultaría poder detener un taxi, asi que lo mejor era cruzar la calle para así esperar el primer transporte que encontrase.
La falta de tráfico me generaba un poco más de tranquilidad, menos ruido, menos humo. Se podía disfrutar de la paz.
Me coloque los audífonos y decidí iniciar mi camino, pero cuando iba a media calle no pude notar el carro que se aproximaba, solo llegué a sentir un empujón y como mi cabeza se golpeaba contra el pavimento. Luego de ello todo estaba negro, tenía la sensación de estar en el aire, que ya mi cuerpo no me pertenecía, el miedo me invadió y aunque trataba de sentir mis extremidades no podía lograrlo. Entonces un fuerte crujido se repetia en mi mente, en ese momento no podía localizar dónde era arriba ni dónde era abajo, solo la repetición constante de ello. No sabía si mi cuerpo aún existía, no sentía mis manos y luego la sensación de presión en mi cabeza inicio como si la apretaran, justo allí ya todo había acabado, en ese momento todo se calmo y ya todo se había detenido, pero unas voces confusas empezaron, no podía determinar lo que decían, ni sentir mis manos para tapar mis oídos y poco a poco estás aumentaban, cada vez más y más, empecé a sentir que mi cabeza iba a explotar, que mi respiración se había empezado a dificultar, pero como es posible si no podía sentir mi cuerpo. Cuando los susurros se habían vuelto gritos intente abrir los ojos pero no sabía cómo hacerlo, ya mi cuerpo no me pertenecía, por un momento todo se calmo, y justo allí pude abrir mis ojos.
Quizás solo fue un sueño, o quizás no, pero estaba en mi habitación otra vez. De ser un sueño puedo decir que fue el más realista que he tenido en toda mi vida. Otra vez, justo a tiempo, tenía que ir al trabajo, esa sensación de realidad no podía quitarla de mi cabeza. Las manos me temblaban, solo deseaba una respuesta, pero sabía que obtenerla era imposible, lo mejor sería distraerme, así que fui por una taza de café y un cigarro, para iniciar mi día, y volver a la realidad. Mientras salía al balcón no pude evitar derramar el café... Hoy no había tráfico.
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Hi, thanks for commenting. Ok, I'll improve that for the next post
Oh! Todo iba a repetirse de nuevo.
Mejor que por esta vez, se quede en casa.
Me encantó tu historia. Gracias por compartirla.
Gracias! Estoy muy feliz de que te hay gustado