Someone who made me love this life time and time again

I'm sure everyone has the saddest experiences in life--an experience that breaks our souls, until we don't know how to put it back together again--. Life feels like a maze whose ends are the things we fear. We find no reason to take any steps. I once stood in that maze.

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My mother once said "Only the oil on the bottom of the sea that is not visible can be taken ashore. The things that are still visible to the eye, we can certainly get if we want to try."

I was a final year student at a public university in Jakarta in 2018. I had run out of studies, until finally I had to accept the harsh reality that I had to drop out of campus. Even though I was only one step away from being able to hold a bachelor's degree. But the universe says otherwise. Since then I feel life is in vain. I always imagined how sad my parents were while crying alone in the room. For almost a year, my life has been empty. During that time my lover always accompanied me to this day.

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My lover's name is Shiva. I got to know her through the Tinder app. Our meeting was normal, we met at a simple food stall in front of the campus. She was a simple girl, her voice was like a child whining for candy. I never imagined I could fall in love with this woman. Until in the end I fell in love many times every time we were about to part at the Pancasila train station or at the Lenteng Agung train station. She is a woman who never gets tired of loving me when I'm down. She is the woman who always says "I believe you will be successful one day." She is also the girl who always whispers "live with me!"

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No one is sane when they are going through the worst times in life. Everything seems foreign, even habits that are initially pleasant can become very strange to us. My girlfriend was once in that position--it's something strange in my eyes--. But she never got tired of adoring me.

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Love need not come in a hurry. Love doesn't have to be passionate when you first meet. Love is what grows and strengthens with time.

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I'm currently sitting on the terrace of the house. Last Saturday night, I just had dinner with my girfriend, then we parted ways at the Lenteng Agung train station. A drizzling rain accompanied our journey. She hugged me tightly while whispering "I always love you in any condition."

Thank you love.
Warm regards: Kaifin Prastyo