What's more important in a partner.... Week 287

Physical looks, humor, or income?

If you had asked me this question some years ago, I might have hesitated, maybe even leaned toward the idea that income was most important. Because let’s be honest, in this world, having financial stability is a big deal. No one wants to struggle, and it’s easy to think that someone’s ability to provide or maintain a lifestyle defines how good a partner they’ll be.

But over time, and through my own experiences, I’ve come to see things differently.

To me, humor, the ability to laugh, to share joy in the middle of chaos, has become far more valuable than how someone looks or how much they earn. That doesn’t mean income doesn’t matter, or that physical attraction isn’t important. Of course, they both play a role. But they’re not what truly sustains a relationship.

Looks can pull you in. That first impression, the smile, the presence, it can make your heart race. But as time goes on, even the most beautiful faces become familiar. When challenges come, beauty doesn’t solve arguments or bring comfort after a long day. You can be with the most attractive person in the world and still feel completely disconnected or unseen.

And income? Yes, it offers comfort. It opens doors, eases stress, and creates opportunities. But money doesn’t automatically mean peace. I’ve seen people with all the money in the world still feel lonely, neglected, or emotionally drained in their relationships. Money can pay for a date, but it can’t buy connection, effort, or genuine understanding. It doesn’t make someone kind. It doesn’t make them present.

Now let’s talk about humor, real, genuine humor. Not just jokes, but someone who knows how to lift your spirit when the weight of life gets heavy. Someone who can turn your silence into laughter, who sees when your energy is low and chooses to lighten the mood without making it feel forced. That kind of laughter creates a bond. It reminds you that even when life isn’t perfect, the person beside you knows how to make the journey easier.
I’ve been around people who made me laugh even in moments I thought I couldn’t smile. And that feeling, that safe, warm, lighthearted space, is unmatched. It makes communication easier, it breaks tension, and it makes the relationship feel alive.

That’s why I’d pick humor over looks and income, not because the others don’t matter, but because life is long, and hard, and unpredictable. You need someone you can be your full self with, someone who can find joy in ordinary moments and bring you back to life when you feel stuck.

At the end of the day, physical attraction may fade, and financial status may rise and fall, but if someone can love you, laugh with you, and help you find light in the darkness, that’s a rare kind of gift. That’s the kind of partner I pray for.

So yes, give me someone who sees the funny side of life, someone who turns dull moments into memories, someone who knows that sometimes laughter really is the best medicine.

Because with laughter, love grows softer. And with that softness, everything else becomes easier to face together.