It is Mother's Day tomorrow and - I thought it was next weekend. Oops!
Normally I am on top of these things, but with so much going on and having Smallsteps at home with me all week on top of that, I wasn't paying attention. It was probably mentioned in the news somewhere, but I don't read the news, especially not the local news. If I had been in the office, someone probably would have mentioned it.
I can't even make up for it now - as my wife already knows I forgot when she mentioned that Sunday was a public Holiday, I asked why, she said "Mother's Day" and I just looked at her blankly.
I really hope Smallsteps has made an awesome card for tomorrow....
I am not very good at anniversaries, birthdays, or silly events like Mother's Day or Christmas - but I am pretty good at random surprise things. How I see it is that it is far more valuable to have someone think about you all the time, than have to be reminded by society to think about you.
It also tends to have more impact, as people expect to get things on these special occasions, but they do not expect to get things on a random day in the middle of the week when nothing special is gong on at all. Again, I think the yield is higher on surprises. Not that these things are about getting a return, but as they say, no act is unselfish.
I am also one of those people that when I am obligated to buy a present, I generally make it something that they need - but when I get to do it randomly, I am far more impulsive and will buy something that they might want, ,but want buy themselves or, something that they might not know they want, but I reckon they will love.
It doesn't have to be something expensive or grand, just something that is thoughtful - thought has a lot of value, but so much of what we consume these days is a thoughtless act, driven by advertising and social proofing. We buy because we have been directed to buy, not because we have thought about the product and really contemplated if we either need or even want it. Yes, the "want" is there because of the marketing, but so often we end up buying things that once we hold them, we realize we didn't really want it much after all.
Buyer's remorse.
One thing that has changed my consumer habits a lot s being in crypto as it has helped me think more keenly about risk and reward, where much of the consumer goods only have the reward of the feeling of purchase, but very little post-reward after that. Buying a new car loses its luster very quickly.
On top of this, there is the value of the item itself. Buying something for a 100 dollars isn't that expensive, unless the alternative is to spend 100 dollars on a token that is going to go 20x 6 months down the track. would you buy the same pair of jeans for 2000 dollars? Highly unlikely. What this means is that I have become far more selective with what I buy, thinking whether I really want it.
Then there is the risk side of the equation, as a lot of people think there is no risk in buying consumer goods because once you spend, you have the item. However, there is a 100% loss on the money spent as for the most part, once bought, that same item can never really be sold on, as most consumer items are valueless. What is a TV worth sold second-hand?
So, over the years I have become more sensitive to the way I use money as there is a very high opportunity-cost component in resource allocation. DeFi and farming has further cemented this into my thinking, as I am now not only looking at the expenditure on token price and potential to go up, but also what that capital is able to earn me over time.
Last mother's day I bought my wife a SMEG kettle that she would never have bought herself. It cost around 200 dollars. That in Bitcoin today would be worth 1200 dollars. split half of that into BNB at the start of the year at 40 dollars and that is 15 BNB - which is worth 9300 dollars. Put that BNB into a Defi pool today could be 27000 dollars by the end of the year. Push this out to all of the other random "present days" across the last year and rather than a kettle, I could have bought my wife an entire kitchen - which we need - and landscaped the entire garden.
That is one bloody expensive kettle!
Of course, we can't always look at it in this way, but I want to hold in mind that even the small economic decisions we make can lead to large changes in outcomes. The trouble is that when we are making the decisions to buy consumer items that make us feel good, we fail to see the results of the other opportunities. We see how some people have done very well over the last year and wish we had the same result - but fail to recognize that they didn't buy the kettle.
So, while I can say "oops!" at the same time, all of the work over the years that I have been doing will hopefully lead to the potential for a lifetime of random surprises, without having to worry too much about what it costs or, how much it is going to bite into our future.
In my opinion, thinking about the way we consume and the way we evaluate risk, reward and our feelings of purchase, is one of the most valuable things we can do.
I can give my wife a card for a massage and a breakfast in bed for Mother's Day and say, the kitchen is in the mail pool.
Taraz
[ Gen1: Hive ]
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Sometimes the surprise is needed regardless of what could have been in the future. Buyers Remorse is/can happen on a lot of things. Did your wife like the kettle when you got it, did it make her feel special, is it still used today, will it maybe become a family heirloom?
80 years in the future:
Smallsteps: "I remember when my father, your great great grandfather gave this kettle to my mom. The look on her face, the huge smile the big big gigantimous hug she gave him. Then how she would prepare his favorite tea on those special occasions, one time he came home from a very hard day at work, somehow mom knew he was having a hard day, she was special in that way, she had a prepared special tea for him"
It is the stories and memories that make the real antiques and no one can really say what will become an antique. Perhaps a simple surprise gift will have more value than 200 dollars worth of BTC. It may have been - -
But it does have the potential to be one amazing family memory.
Yes of course - she drinks more tea than half of England combined :D Not sure if any appliance these days becomes an heirloom. However, that does remind me of a kettle that my grandad used that must have been from the early 1950s. @galenkp might remember the one.
Just thinking - there might be a context difference for kettle. For us, it is what you boil the water in - whereas where the tea steeps is called a teapot. Is that the same?
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I don't think there is a context thing. I was thinking back to a copper kettle my mom had to boil the water in, the whistle would mean the water is just right and then add to the tea cup and steep or if she had friends over into the fancy teapot to steep. Her kettle had a round stamped out farm scene on both sides and scroll work around the lid.
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tokens.I enjoyed reading this because it echoes some of my thoughts and feelings regarding holiday-driven giving.
To me, the same way everyone has their own unique nutrition preferences and sleep schedules, people 'should' have their own 'giving preferences & schedules' as well.
Having 'giving' mandated (or heavily influenced) by fairly arbitrary societal holidays feels... off somehow, to me.
That said, the issue's never really seemed like a 'hill to die on,' so I'm fine to happily play the holiday-giving game as it seems to bring some measure of joy to others as well as 'keeping the peace' in my own circles.
You've taken it a step further though with the risk/reward and economics-based look at even the tiniest decisions.
Very thought-provoking stuff, thank you.
This is the thing, isn't it? It no longer becomes a personal decision, it is habit, tradition - automatic.
What I do with this is, randomly buy for these holidays too. Sometimes, my wife goes years without a Valentine's gift, then gets something special and complains - because she didn't get me anything :D
I find a balance point in reality, but I try to keep my mindset leaning towards frugality first, and then actively moving if I choose.
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That's exactly it. I don't really care what day gifts happen on, as long as it's an intentional, inspired, conscious decision as opposed to an auto-pilot one. That's my preference, at least.
Randomly buying for holidays is a great way to handle it. And I'm glad you're practical enough to find a balance point in reality while maintaining your mindset. May more people adopt a similar approach. :)
As usual, thanks for the food for thought! 🙏
You have made the best reflection on money and consumption, sometimes we don't realise that every thing we buy when we use it automatically loses its value, I think that by understanding this we would stop buying many unnecessary things. My wife and my mother would be happy if I gave them some crypto, but not everyone sees it that way.
"Why did you give me this fake internet money!?!" :D
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Yup. They can and do lead to significant changes in outcomes overall. Only things is one cannot be too hard-nosed on these things. Mothers day for Instance is a day mothers get to feel extra special for some reason. It may be true in an actual sense that we shouldn't always buy the proverbial kettle just cause society says so, but sometimes being asked to conform in other to please those we care about isn't always something we can escape
Some people take these days very seriously - but is it about the gift? What is wrong with buying some good ingredients and making a nice dinner?
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Today @laputis and I shared a glass of beer. Costed about 2 euros. I wonder what these euros would be worth if added to cubdefiand compounded in a year, 5 year or 10 years.
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It depends which pool you put them in. :D
A glass of beer and a pub these days in Finland is about 7€ I think...
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Beer-bub farm haha
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You idjit!
Yep. Idjit is the word.
I thought I had the monopoly on being an idiot...Seems others share the load.
I bought Mayfair and Park Lane
Lol.
I usually get anxious when I have to get someone a gift. I love giving what I can be reminded by because I love receiving such gifts too.
And sides birthdays, I usually give presents for special days like Valentine's Day and Mothers Day a day or two before. And if I forget, I give it a week later.
I love spontaneous acts like that. People don't realize they love it until they receive it. Most times, it's the thought, rather than the price, that counts.
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Yeah. People have forgotten about "it is the thought that matters" and come special days, they forget all those other days where they were thought of. People don't seem to remember all the days they were happy, when they are currently sad.
This is true and sad. It's all for the stories though. "I got those flowers on Valentine's Day" sounds better than "I got them on a random Tuesday"
Very nice idea.. But I don't know if women think this way too. I used to feel that gifts should be what people need.. I remember gifting a friend a dcity account worth 200 hive and showing her how to compound it to make it worth 1000 hive. It is merely worth 1500 hive but she claims I have never given her a gift.
Anyways I guess your analogy is the best even if most people wont understand that you are looking at things in the long term.
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Crypto women thinks this way :)
Most people, regardless of sex, don't see it this way. Also, most people in the world are poor. Mindset matters.
This was obviously going to turn into a post about finance. But I liked the transition from the story about forgetting Mother's Day into that part. I bet Smallsteps will make the save with ease.
Smallsteps always saves the day :)
Lolz
Interesting message. In my opinion, the best gift for a wife on Mother's Day is to go to friends and give the opportunity to spend time mother and child, without interference :)
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I'm sure it will be fine, there's other Mother Days and even more days XD