There is probably no way that everything in your life will turn out as you originally planned, no matter how careful you might have planned your life, things happen that will make you change. Each time we have overcome challenges we have always emerge stronger and wiser.
A long time ago I was with a friend, he was depressed and lost. I told him I understand how you feel simply at a loss as to where you belong and what you ought to be doing with your life. I understand that adulthood is difficult especially for you guys. They feel such pressure to become something, to achieve, to make money, to feel belong among your friends and this while they have no idea of how to become that man.
Now about yourself
Sometimes the things you have said to yourself are harsh to the point of self defeating. You have said lots of things maybe out of frustration or anger. Can you imagine telling someone what you say to yourself.
You have done nothing worthy, you have achieved nothing, no experience to offer, you have bad performance at school or at work. Who cares what you have to say? No one cares and no friends. Is this the way I should look? My mates are good looking with hips and muscles.
I understand that you were been honest about how you feel and saying all those things to someone is very harsh same with yourself. I do hear of depression, when you have to express painful and sad emotions. If you find yours in this situation do something you enjoy doing like dancing, playing music, do videos of yourself pouring out your emotions, write down your emotions, see a doctor or speak with your loved ones. Addressing your depression is helpful in improving your outlook and motivating you to take positive steps that will change your life.
Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven't found it yet, keep looking. Don't settle. As with all matters of the heart, you'll know when you find it. — Steve Jobs
Everyone has a passion they wish to fulfill. It matters not a whit what your passion is, it only matters that you find one. This is something you are willing to commit to, to give your life to and your blood, sweat and tears. Your passion is a source of joy, a deep, deep feeling of joy.
As much as you have accomplished on your own, having a mentor, someone whom you admire and respect, to talk to is important. He or she is successful and has traveled the road you are on. A mentor is an invaluable resource, an individual who possesses the wisdom to hold a mirror up to you, as it were, so you can see yourself as others do, to advise you and encourage you. If you can, identify such a person in your life, approach him or her, and explain the effort you have been making to find yourself. Ask this individual if s/he would be willing to be your sounding board.
Everything you need for a new beginning is in you. If you continue to think you are friendless, mindless and physique less then you will continue to be that. Picture yourself having friends, having a brilliant mind and a unique physique. And really put some emotion behind how that would feel. Your reality reflects you. Change your thoughts to what you want instead of what you don't want and your reality will change. You have the power to create any new beginning you choose.
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