The results of going all in

I find myself getting more and more attention doing the same thing I’ve been doing. I could easily analyze the causes of this, but since I decided to try and start living life as if I have nothing to lose, it just makes sense in a way that is beyond all reason.

Life wants you to be consistent in the things your believe and to pursue greater versions of yourself. It doesn’t mean you don’t course correct or change your mind, but the “what ifs” bring up fear and that fear is to be overcome. In the overcoming of fear, things begin to fall into place.

I knew this well enough in my head but it’s only very recently that my heart is able to internalize it because no amount of reasoning can make up for real lived experience.

I could blame more attention at hive on the fact that I powered up a lot of Leo, but the decision to power up Leo was just a practical decision, combined with intuition and a desire to put my money where my mouth is and be able to shape the world around me.

When I see a project reach its lowest point in price value as the tech and development is coming together and the team has good, realistic ideas about how to grow the ecosystem and create something people want to use, it kind of feels like a no brainer.

And people like when you have conviction. They gravitate towards it.

Rather than complain about not having many people who are interested in similar things, I realize that if I power up and onboard, I can encourage the kind of people I want to stay here and maybe even bring some people into the mix who weren’t interested in such things before.

I could attribute more recognition in my IRL community to the fact that I am dressing more colorfully in a way that invites more attention and people slowly realizing that I am more capable than they thought.

The old me would be frustrated because fundamentally the things I talk about and share haven’t changed much, and it’s silly that people look to others to see what and who they should like, but then it’s no coincidence that this change happens just as I decide to go all in on my dreams.

On the surface it looks as if people have just started identifying me as someone “cool”, or someone who will give them some social cred, but none of this is due to scheming, and trust me, I’ve tried playing people before, it made me feel like crap and it didn’t even work.

In reality, I am emitting different vibes and people can feel it. There are a few people who are just looking for social cred, but that’s just the periphery. The things I say hit now like they didn’t before, and it’s because I’m fully invested in them.

I know that with my bank account at $0.98 most people would be making plans to earn money by whatever means necessary but I am committed to living the life I want to live and becoming the person I want to become, and no amount of security is going to steer me off that path now. If it slows down my ship, we aren’t stopping.

Last time I was here I caved. I did what I thought I had to do to survive. I doubled down on the stuff I didn’t believe in. And I cycled through the ups and downs only to find that life still wanted to teach me this lesson: I can have the life I want, if I’m willing to feel good about working towards it, and not let fear get in my way.

I still have multiple backup plans. I still use logic and reasoning. I just don’t sit in fear and indecision anymore. I do everything I can think of to feel good and to keep moving forward.

Most importantly I give what I give unconditionally now. I’m not as worried about how people can use it against me, I don’t wait for repayment, I just keep giving. If there is one person who wants to be an asshole and take something without any gratitude there will be 5 more who will feel true appreciation and show it.

When you can give unconditionally, nothing can get in your way. Of course you don’t give what you can’t afford to give, but contrary to popular belief, love is free, good vibes are free, and you can generate them out of thin air.

I just ask myself “what would make me smile or laugh right now?” And if I can’t find anything, I just play with everything I can til I find something.

I wanted to put even more fire into this but it’s been a long weekend and a long Monday and I am already a little burnt out.

Time for a winding down for a few hours before sleep, and then rekindling the fire as soon as I wake up.
🔥 🔥 🦭 🔥 🔥

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