I can be consistent. Until I can't! It's always something outside of the norm, outside of my control, some external factors that I hadn't anticipated and counted on that just whacks me out of my groove. And it could be the silliest things too. If you're an OG and remember me doing the 90 day - wake up early - Challenge, the reason why I didn't continue with it as an 'established habit', was because.. of.. a DREAM! (Cue the dramatic cord effect from Monty Python and the Holy Grail) Yup. It took one emotionally charged dream to completely whipe out ALL of my hard earned 'habit building' progress, after already having the 90 under my belt.
Sometimes my habit imune brain can be just so frustrating. I've tried building habbits early and often. I've dug through countless self help books, listened to countless hours of videos and podcasts, thinking, there must have been something I've missed (uuuhm, yeah, maybe like a diagnosis, something that's not going to be talked about in personal development books), something I've overlooked, and if I just figured that one thing out, I'd finally be FIXED!
I've tried a lot of things. And not a lot has worked in regards to that golden goose that everyone's looking for especially in this cronically online world - Consistency!
For a completely fresh 'habit' that I want to deliberately start off with, I've noticed that around day 3 it's when it gets critical. It's when brutforcing with pure will is starting to fail to work and the habit itself has not kicked in yet. So days 3-5 are quite critical. After that, if everythings going smoothly otherwise, it get's to be easier again. IF however, something else starts to demand more of your attention, something unpredicted happens, that's when I tend to get whacked off my track.
Sooner or later I realised that it's not so much about 'not falling off the track', but rather - how quickly and effortresly can I jump right back in, because I've also noticed that the longer it takes to get back on track, the more willpower/emotional/mental effort it takes to do so. It is also extremely important to not pile on such unnecessary feelings like guilt or shame on top of evertyhting that already made me fall off in the first place, because that too only makes things worse.
So, it's important not to lose momentum, but if it is lost, find the lest resistant way to get right back at it. If no such least resistant way is found, and all that IS available is just blank staring, whilst internaly fighting, draining energy and just looping on the feelings of overwhelm - THEN it is crucial to actually take a step back and NOT attempt it until the brin has had the chance to get out of the battling itself mode.
Sometimes, especially if it is something mentally taxing that needs to be done, I find that the best way to start is - either by starting on smaller easier tasks to get the ball rolling, or if no easier tasks are available - get SOOOOO bored that the mentally challenging task becomes the only interesting thing for the brain to actually indulge in, and before you know it, you're already in it - hyperfocused, like it has always been the most exciting thing to you.
There was this whole experiment about how our brain is wired to avoid boredom SO much that we'll even do something that we KNOW is painful, just to alleviate the feeling of boredom. And THAT is something that we can use to our advantage. If mentally taxing task is something the brain equates to - pain - then we only need to bore the brain out of it's own mind.. so to say.
Another trick I've noticed, especially when it comes to remembering things, but can also apply to consistently doing something - is to take it ABSOLUTELY PERSONALLY. Like, define yourself by it if you must! Make it something that's so deeply personal for you that without that thing/activity/memory you'd litterally be nobody.
One more thing that I've noticed that it is easier to create new habits and routines in a completely new environment. Your brain does not have all the previous patterns to go by so it will take to a new habit easier if you say - in THIS new environment that we have to survive in, we do THESE things. Oh, and, yeah, of course, it is WAY easier to change your habits if you don't have to convince someone else's brain on top of all of it to accept the new behaveour, especially someone who thinks they 'know you better than you know yourself'.
But yeah, always keep in mind that I can't tell you what will work for you - I don't know your personality, I don't know how your stars are aligned, I don't know how uniquely your brain functions. I can only share my expereiences, what I've experimented with and noticed what works for ME and what doesn't, so that you can maybe try them out if you feel like it, or discard all of this as irrelevant to you, because what you struggle with specifically may not be what I struggle with and vice versa. So whenever I write about any of this 'pesonal development' stuff.. Know that it's PESONAL and may or may not work for you. It's all about trail and error and experimentation.
Stay smart about your energy and motivation levels, and I'll catch you later!
~Josie~