Disclaimer: The events depicted in this write-up and video are fictitious. Any similarity to any person you know on hive is merely your mind messing with you.

Don't laugh!

I won't be responsible for any choking during the course of reading this or watching the video.

Before I start with my world epic embarrassment day, I'd like to take this time out to celebrate @dreemport on her one year anniversary. Woot! Woot!! Woot!!. It's been one year of sweat, sleepless nights and hard work. Congratulations @dreemport and the entire staff.

hereTo celebrate the birthday, @dreemsteem in her usual bubbly way has lined up events for each day this week and today is day three. You can check it out . And in her usual prickly way, she listed dancing as one of the activities to mark the celebration. That's why you find me here attempting to embarrass myself and I hope I do badly at it. @dreemsteem I'm on the lookout for your video and that of @penderis and @bluefinstudios.

Dancing reminds me of an event that took place many years ago. You know back then when I was still a great dancer with all my bones in agreement with me and ready to do my bidding. Back then I was a fire dancer. No kidding! Anyways, I went to this party, it was my induction night party. I had a hard time choosing what to wear but finally settled for a black jeans and a brown t-shirt. I looked amazing. When I got into the venue, everyone admired me.

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After the whole boring speech, it was time to dance. The moment I've been waiting for. It was time to show off my dancing skills. I cat walked to the center stage and started dancing with a colleague of mine. The light was on us because I was a really good dancer. I was doing legwork and handwork and whining my waist, shaking what my mama gave me.

I wanted to do more, you know, something to wow the crowd. I turned my back to my partner and bent my upper body so that my head was at the same level with my knees with hands firmly placed on my knees. All I needed to do was twist like a snake on him but then I heard the shredding sound. My trouser gave in with a tear from the back to the front. Literally speaking, my ass was on his face and I forgot to wear panties.

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Don't ask me what happened next. Just know I never danced for a very long time and so my bones became rigid and uncooperative. Now when I dance I feel like a chicken.

The next time I danced was several years later. I lived in a compound that loved to party. They just look for an excuse to bring a DJ, empty some beer bottles and watch the women twerk. I can never twerk to save my life. If you doubt it, that's what I look like twerking.

I noticed each time I dance my tongue sticks out like a dog. Does that happen to anyone? Do you notice it in the gif? I had to add a dog sticker since we are kinda doing the same thing here.

Dancing is fun! Once I get into the groove, there is no stopping me. I always thought I'd dance so well at my wedding but I was more concerned about the wedding gown not getting torn than dancing😃. The vendor was very clear on my buying a new one if there was any tear. Anyways I danced to my satisfaction when I changed to my second dress but without my heels🤫 you see that lady with a blink blink fruity on her head? That resembles me.

I have made a little video for your viewing pleasure. Just consider it a little gift from me to you but don't forget to tell me the expression on your face while you watched the video.

@dreemsteem you know you are the only one who could make me do this. I never chicken out😜