I can't get used to my life without you.

I was only left with the curls of your hair, with your perfume of roses that evaporates more and more each year.

I was left with your improvised "I love you's" and your arms wrapped around me with tenderness.

I was left with sleepless dawns, with thousands of dreams that did not come true and you left your brushes and many paintings in the studio where every day you painted or retouched something new.

I remember arriving tired from work and not giving you a kiss when I looked at you. I feel bad when I think about it.

To have skimped on the magical moments I had with you. Making you smile for example, giving you a surprise from time to time, answering your affectionate messages, covering you with kisses and hugs every day... I lived believing that you were eternal.

I lived believing that you were eternal and I neglected so many things that I would have done with you.

Vacations as a couple, the child we didn't have, that dinner postponed, those walks we didn't take and so many evenings you waited for me with the fireplace lit.

With strawberries with chocolate and champagne ice cream, all ready for me expressing how much you loved me.

How come I didn't see your details that always made me fall in love with you

I was left with your laughter, with the closet full of your clothes, with a great pain in my chest, How was it that I didn't see you being so close to me

It was an April afternoon when I returned home and you were lying on the edge of the bed with your eyes open, perhaps looking for me in your last breath.

I clung to your body, I went mad with pain when I felt that there was no more heartbeat in your heart

I was left alone with your love and your memory wishing I was the one who had gone and not you.

Now I understand that our love was immense because you fed it every day, I only received everything you gave me.

Now I see your pictures with me, tears roll down my cheeks without noticing it, they slide like seas crying your memory, looking for you in every thing I touch your life

I raise my eyes to the sky and I see you in every star and I can't get used to my life without you.