This departure from my tasks is also a necessity for reasons that you will only be able to understand later, as I progress through the story.
Despite the holidays, I don't feel any desire to have fun.
Due to the somewhat traumatic events that caused me to suffer a kind of nervous breakdown, and culminated in my success, my boss recommended I go to therapy or write my memoirs as a form of therapy so that I could somehow transcend and overcome everything I experienced.
I chose the second option as I have difficulty dealing with human beings outside the sphere of work, and for this, I am alone in a hut isolated from civilization situated on top of a high cliff and very close to the ocean.
The house is just over 30 minutes by car from a small fishing village down towards the plain and the beaches.
Despite being a beach place, I am in the extreme south of the country where the climate is no longer so tropical, here it is very windy, it is very cold and in winter it sometimes snows.
From the balcony, I watch the sea raging and the gray and tenebrous clouds giving birth to lightning and pregnant with rain and storm when a cold front arrives from even further south.
It's a bit lonely here, I miss human warmth, but as I've hardly ever had this privilege of being loved, it's not so difficult for me to be alone with myself.
You could say that a young, single and lonely girl should be afraid in this wilderness, but that is not the case, as my report goes forward you will also realize that I am not afraid, on the contrary, I am courageous to the point of this virtue many times put me in high-risk situations.
This isolation is fundamental for me to be able to write, throughout my life I rarely thought about myself. I was always involved in the task of helping other people, who often made me a puppet in their plans.
I also got into a lot of trouble and got into a rather dangerous line of work.
Although all I intend to narrate is what I perceived to be the truth and reality of events as they unfolded, I will not be able to give any specific details or display actual photos of myself for security reasons.
This will be a recapitulation report and I apologize for going back so much in time, more precisely my earliest childhood when I went to live with my aunt on a farm in the interior of Minas Gerais.
To be continued...
Image - This text was written by me and is totally original, if you want contact me - Júlia Santos - julyasaints@gmail.com
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I am sure it will get better soon. When it gets darker I keep the faith.