Into the night

It's past 12 and my weary self couldn't help but lay on the sofa exhausted from all the daily shenanigans that life bring. I pulled myself up to the balcony, looking out as the distant yet magnificent twin towers shimmering their special colored lights. 31st August, the day our country commemorates her independence.

And here I am, quietly enjoying her beauty.

I think back of the recent happenings surrounding me. Some happy, some sad. I wish I could write them down, alas my heart and mind fail me. My body, all the more.

I wonder how long more will this journey continue, and what awaits in the distant time ahead. I pray that she be kind to all, it has been trying to many, if not for most for the last two years.

My children keep me on my toes. They are the reason I wake up in the morning, the reason I look forward to my days. I love their presence. It's not perfect, but it is our beautiful chaos.

There are some days though, they are all but a blur. I couldn't find the lines as to where the direction goes. For someone who is bad at directions, it scares me. My heart feels like the blurry nights. Its faded silhouette tells of a forgotten story, and yet nobody hears.

I tell myself to give thanks, and to look to those who matter most. To focus my gaze on them, their eyes, their voices. Their hearts sing a thousand prayers, you'll find their arms stretched wide. They are the healers, the comforters, the believers. Oftentimes they are quiet, but their love is loud. They are God in flesh, bearing His image and showing glimpses of Himself to the world and to those who seek to find Him, even in the most obscure places.

I breathe in and out a deep sigh of relief. My comfort is quiet and true. I went to bed laying beside my deeply sleeping children, watching their chests rise and fall like the rhythms of heaven. And I, too rest my head.