The world is quite complicated sometimes; when we see what people are going through and enduring, all in the name of love and the likes, you can't help but stand in awe at how ridiculous it is, and yet while you see it as bad and you're trying to help such people out of their mystery, you'll find them being adamant about staying and even going as far as defending those who are being toxic to them. I believe this is due to some psychological issues, and in this write-up I'll state my opinion about it.

Everyone knows the dangers of toxic relationships, how they can lead to severe fractures, injuries, psychological breakdown, and even death if care isn't taken, and it's surprising how some people who, on a normal day, you'll hear them talk about the need to flee from any toxic relationship, would still be the same set of people who'll be enduring the same and giving ridiculous excuses to defend the person inflicting such on them.

A few years ago, during my undergraduate days, I used to live in the same hostel with a lady who was in a relationship with a guy back then. This guy literally spent most of his time at her place and even depended on whatever the lady's parents gave her as what they'll both eat, and yet despite the fact that the lady is the sole provider of their relationship and gives him her all, he'll still maltreat her, beating her and even sometimes bringing another lady to the house and locking the actual owner of the house outside till he's done.

It's quite surprising and disheartening to see someone go through all of those. I mean, if it were my sister who was in her shoes and I was aware, I know I'll definitely do an undo, but then I, for one, just like every one of her other neighbors, still try to sit her down and talk sense into her, but all she does is cry, wailing in pain and defending his actions. You'll hear her say things like, It's my fault; I caused it; I shouldn't have done what I know he doesn't like.

I mean, does that even sound reasonable? Regardless of if you do something right or wrong, that's never an excuse for you to get beaten by someone who claimed they loved you or even take another lady to the same house you both stayed in. It's just ridiculous, but what can I do? All we can do is advise, and the last time we the neighbors took actions into our hands by chasing the guy away, it was the lady herself who ended up going to plead with him to forgive her. Funny enough, he still beat her that very day he returned.

So using that lady's situation alongside others I've witnessed who continually endure toxic relationships, like I said earlier, it's a psychological issue. I mean, that's what I think. It's because after several conversations with most of them, one thing I've come to notice is that they're afraid of losing someone they love, probably afraid of the ideal of being without them or living without someone who loves them.

Another is the fact that they're afraid of what the future holds for them; most times these people are so engrossed in their current relationship that they don't picture themselves outside of it; they don't see a future for themselves outside that place, and that's why they keep defending these riffraff who don't respect them or care for them one bit.

Sometimes these partners of theirs are the ones who have taken advantage of their trauma to manipulate their mindset; it's quite disheartening, but then it's the truth, and other times it's due to societal pressure. Many of these people, although they felt the pain of being abused, yet they can't leave because people around them keep pressuring them about the need to get married and settle down, and because of that, they'll keep enduring the challenges just so they can meet the needs of the society.

So I believe those are some of the reasons why these people choose to endure rather than leave for their own wellbeing and in aspects of toxic boss or work environment, one major reasons why people keeps enduring and not leave is because they know how difficult it's to get a job and since they've bills to pay, they Just keeo enduring whatever comes, so they'll at leats have a source income, because they're not certain of their ability to secure another job early if they leave that behind because of the toxicity that's there.

Overall it's my prayer that everyone in such situation finds the strength to leave and that there'll come to the realisation that what they're enduring isn't ideal, that people around them will rise and render them the support required to leave, and have the ability to dream again, realising that they're king's and queen, who deserves nothing but the best.

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All photos are taken and edited on canva.

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