That One Misstep of An Impulsive and Young Me

in Hive Learners7 months ago

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While growing up in this modern age as a young guy, there was a very strong attraction to the latest devices and technology. People around my age happened to have the newest laptops, sleek tablets and of course, the much desired MacBook laptops wherever I laid my eyes. It was more important to me to feel like I belonged in this modern world, fit in, and stay connected and up-to-date than it was to simply own those devices.

I still do remember the moment I entered the gadget store and saw the sleek, metallic MacBook resting on their showcase shelf. I was so drawn by the thought of having it as a sign of belonging with other people and a way of productivity, I literally pictured myself doing so many things using that MacBook. However, there was a big obstacle in my way of getting my dream MacBook, which was definitely money. Having zero source of income of my own as a teenager made buying such an expensive item seem impossible. But the dream of having a MacBook of my own was too attractive for me to resist. I wanted something that could help me explore my interests and passions, to feel like I belonged with these people, and to stay up to date with other people my age.

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Though, like a lot of impulsive and young adults around my age, I made a choice that would always come back to haunt me: I chose to pay for my MacBook purchase with a loan. That seemed like a good way out of that situation for me back then. I simply thought of it and said to myself that even if it was far out of my reach, it is worthy of everything. And even thought of repaying those loans by doing some part time jobs and freelancing with that laptop.
The day I went to buy it, I remember I left the store grabbing my brand-new MacBook, full of excitement and anticipation. I had the impression that I was carrying the key to a new fascinating world in my arms. I was eager to start using it and let my imagination run as wild as I can be.

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But it wasn't going to take long for my world to fall around me. The prior excitement of owning a MacBook started to wear off as the days passed into weeks, weeks passed into months, and the harsh reality of my financial situation became visible to me. Turns out, it was going to be much harder than I used to think to repay the loan. My usual expenses were barely met by the part-time job that I used to do and somehow I could bring in some extra bucks for the monthly loan payments but I was always running short of money in that way.

That was the time when I finally realised that I was badly trapped in a never ending cycle of debts. Every single month, as the loan payment deadline used to come nearer, I used to have that worst kind of panic attacks or anxiety in my stomach. I was really struggling to make ends meet. That was the time I reduced bills, skipped meals, and even gave up on social outings. However, despite my best efforts, it never seemed to be enough for it. As the problems kept increasing, I started to hate that very thing that used to excite me before. My once dearly loved MacBook started to give me reality checks. I truly felt imprisoned by the burden of both my debt and my own impulsive decisions that I made.

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Not much later after that there was also a glimpse of hope in the midst of darkness. I came to a conclusion that I could not keep going down this road of financial damage forever. I had to make some changes in order to be financially stable, face the mistakes I made head-on, and act upon them. My friends and family did support me a lot and encouraged me. My parents wanted to pay the debt off for me but I decided to act myself as a young adult and take responsibility. So later we came up with ways to pay off my debt and take back financial authority together. To be stable enough, I totally cut off my wasteful expenses, took on additional hours at work, and even started tutoring some kids and juniors.

It wasn't always simple and there were times when I really wanted to give up badly. But as time went by, I started to notice the changes. As I reduced my debt with every month that went by, getting closer to being debt-free. And I experienced a wave of relief as the huge amount of loans kept reducing.

As of now, as I sit here typing on my MacBook whenever I look back on that time of my life, I am unavoidably thankful for what I learned from it but also regrets being so impulsive. Then again, I truly gained knowledge about the value of sound money management, the cons of impulsive spending, and the necessity of asking for assistance when you really need it. Even though my journey to recovery was a long and difficult one, in the end it helped me become more resilient and mature and I really ended up learning so many things at once.

Have a good day!!!

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