"'Worst Answer" POB Competition (#005) - Worst way to feed your fish

We are now running the fifth "Worst Answer" contest. It is crazy that we have done 5 of these so far and keep getting answers so thank you all!

Some wise people helped me to workshop some new questions, @morenow and @nevies and @johnhtims.life , and basically it boiled down to it needs to be something anyone can jump in an answer, something everyone automatically knows the worst way and it pops into your head.

This was one was actually a direct suggestion from the above group and I loved the absurdity of it and I am so keen to see how everyone goes with it


So the questions is..

"How will you feed your pet fish?"

Remember we want the worst ideas so please dig deep (or shallow?)!

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Ok so the prize will be!

1st 10 POB
2nd 5 POB
3rd 1 POB

We will close in 7 days and need at least 3 answers


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I feed my pet fish rival gangsters.

But, I suspect that my answer is just a common answer, and certainly not the worst answer.

ADDED: But maybe this could be considered a worst way to feed fish as the fish are prone to suffer lead poisoning in the process.


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Love the twist ending great work and thanks for playing!

I would build them a little kitchen in the corner of the aquarium. This is an ingenious plan because the little buggers can eat whenever they want, not when I remember to dump some food there. I'd include a mini-cooler packed full of brine shrimp, a cupboard with some mac-n-chz, a little oven, and boom 💥, we're done! Wait, no boom, that would get water everywhere. Oh, and make sure the oven is gas, not electric, or there will be a fish-fry when they turn it on. 😬 Yeah, nothing can go wrong now...

This is brilliant and I can totally imagine it ! Love the ability to feed them themselves and not being electric oven!

From my years of experience, traveling around the globe, making my way to the deepest jungles and the highest mountains, crossing many deserts and scorched landscapes, I have found the wisdom to how to feed a fish in the best way possible in the universe. Or better, in all multiverse.

It all starts with this, then you do that, but never do that two times, only this. After this you go and buy more of that, to add to this, and finally you give those to these. It's pretty simple after you understand that this is not that, but this. And this is how I'll feed my fish from now on.

Glad I could help!


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The most perfect conherant answer to date, thank you!

I hope I can #nsfw this comment... mhh at least not by just adding the tag... I will just write it small

Shit in the bowl :^)

Just brilliant 👏

Haha damn, I was gonna say that.


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Liverworst?


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Thanks for joining in!

I will feed my fish pure air in an earthen environment devoid of water.

The force them to evolve route I love it, might I suggest a heat lamp for extra comfort?

I like your heat lamp idea and I'll raise that to Direct Energy Laser beam for instant fryification. 😜

Thinking a little I got the idea of cannibalism, I would cook in small portions of course, fish in different recipes, even sushi, maybe some fried fish too, or fish with garlic sauce, I would turn it into a kind of gourmet cannibal fish pet.

pez anibal lecter.png


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Wow terrible great answers, love the detail of different fish food types! Thanks for playing

I feed my fish lasagna. He's nuts for it but it's making him fat. Did I mention my fish's name was Garfield? I also have a dog I named Odie...

Haha good one thanks for playing and sorry your fish must hate mondays

I place the cutlery and plates on the table, along with a baked turkey, pork chops, medium-rare meats, vegetables, some breads, along with a glass of good wine. For dessert some chocolate cake, coffee and other sweets. I take my friend out of the fish tank and sit him in the chair to enjoy it, but not before telling him that he must eat it all before returning to his place.

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Brilliant!!! Love the diagram for visual representation

I will compress the food into hard pellets and blast them at the fish with a paintball gun.


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Very inventive I like it!

OMG! I can not believe it and this is awesome but I think you already know because a few have already answered but its blue because its on a sunday but orange flew some goodness but you need to be careful of the aquarium under the sea but to the left of smith lane. No not purple sky tangarine appears on a nightmare, but then you have to jump 3 times just incase but left right left SUNDER A DEMON but not a car because broom went the little green frog. Take two steps and sprinkle and your done.


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i had an aquarium when i was a teenager but though i fed them hourly my fish never lived very long. i concluded they needed some mineral supplements so i mixed some iodine and copper in with the commercial fish food but they didn't survive any longer than before. so i started catching them by hand and holding their mouth open and force feeding them rabbit droppings. again that didn't work out too well. method four was of course IV, commonly known as the roman numeral method or in proper medical technical terms parenteral nutrition. i was neither the mother nor father of the fish so it seemed a little awkward. nonetheless i prepared a saline solution with the essential mineral supplements previously used but made sure i included sufficient quantities of zinc this time. i then caught the fish, found a vein and inserted the needle. after i connected the tube with the liquid food i replaced the fish in the aquarium. they were so well fed that even after they stopped swimming and floated to the surface they continued to receive proper nutrition. now that you mention it maybe i should get an aquarium i miss those little guys. i would of course use method IV.


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Quite a simple task at hand. I will chew on some fish food and spit it right into the tank for my pet fish to eat. Why would a person chew on fish food you ask? Well, don't underestimate my appetite and it is perfectly safe for a human like me to munch on some algae goodness. ¯_(ツ)_/¯.

I'll feed my fish fitch


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