Over the years, the rate of divorce has continued go be on the rise globally. We've seen families who are so happy together at a point and before you know it news is going around that the husband has filled for divorce or that the wife has done so. Of course there are several parties that make up a home these divorce scenarios most times ends up leaving a partner behind or even a partner and the child or children behind.
As the rate of divorce continues to shoot up we tend to overlook the impact it ends up having on the partner or partners or even the child or children who are as a result of the union in he first place. But then in a way divorce seems like a way of getting out of an unhappy union. The question still remains at what price?
A FORCED SEPARATION
Although people have found divorce as a way of getting out of an unhappy union or marriage which to some extent is quite understandable and excusable there is this form of divorce or separation that is rarely talked about and it's impact or effect on the partner. It's quite easy to an extent for you to know that your partner who has filled for a divorce is officially and openly telling you they are no longer interested in the marriage or union but what about partners who were never willing to give up on their marriage, who never in a million years thought about ending their relationship with their partners, who know in thier heart of heart that their partners are in it 100%.
It might sound quite confusing that a partner who is totally committed to the relationship will all of a sudden decide to walk out on the relationship or union.
Well, one thing that is certain for everyone on this planet is answering to the call that your time on earth is done. Yes the cold hands of death does not really tell you when it's coming does it?
THE DEATH OF A PARTNER
Growing up in a military barracks and having a military man as a dad I have always had this 'when will a mission be the last mission's thought in my head. For so many months dad can go for a mission and won't be seen at home for those months until their time on the mission is up then we start anticipating his return. I could remember vividly it was the era where telephone sets were just gaining grounds as a new world technology so even dad didn't have one at that point not to talk of mum so communication was a problem.
During those periods, the return of the deployed military men is always met with anguish, anticipation, anxiety you name it. Wife's and mothers, children and other family members are often waiting anxiously for the return of the man of the house. But the painful aspect of all these is the fact that it is not always all who went on a mission that returns. So on a return day like this some wife's may become widows, children who will never see their father ever again. At this point, a forced separation has occured leaving long term devastating effect on the family members left behind.
The sudden death of a partner can really have a terrible effect on the family he or she leaves behind. Often times I have seen a partner become a shadow of the person they once were due to this forced separation. I know of a man who was known to be a very responsible father and husband and it all changed for him when he lost his wife and all of a sudden alcohol became his friend, he was barely attending to his children anymore. It was as though a totally different man now existed. Somehow I felt what he lost in his partner is what he is subconsciously trying to make up for in drowning himself in alcohol but then when you are sober it all comes back to you doesn't it?.
THE CHILDREN
On one side we have the partner that was left behind trying to be strong for the children even though it is not so easy then on the other hand also we have the children who are missing their mom or dad and are having to deal with such great loss.
This forced separation in a way has this long term negative effect on people even though we all try to act strong and be strong but deep down there is a lot that is going on. Dealing with a forced separation is one of the hardest things that an individual can go through and the strength to go through such is always needed be it from friends or from other family members.
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