2 months without nicotine

Quería esperar un tiempo para hablar de como ha sido la experiencia realmente en un periodo mas largo, hace dos meses deje el cigarrillo gracias a que una muela me estaba matando del dolor, prácticamente lo deje obligada, sin previo aviso y sin “disfrutar” realmente el ultimo cigarrillo. No fue facil, pero tampoco tan horrible como lo imagine, al menos los primeros días, luego de que me mejore de mi muela empecé a sentir la necesidad de fumar nuevamente.

I wanted to wait a while before talking about what the experience has really been like over a longer period. Two months ago, I quit smoking because a toothache was killing me. I practically had to quit, without warning and without really "enjoying" the last cigarette. It wasn't easy, but it wasn't as awful as I imagined, at least not in the first few days. After my toothache healed, I started feeling the urge to smoke again.

Corazón banner (1).png

Durante un día normal, fumaba casi dos cajetillas de cigarrillos, lo que quiere decir que cualquier actividad o momento a solas lo debía “celebrar” fumando y cuando deje de fumar sentía esa necesidad de auto recompensarme con un cigarrillo, por suerte eran ataques muy breves, solo duraba un par de minutos y luego ya no sentía las ganas de fumar, asi, poco a poco he logrado olvidarlo cada día menos. Aunque en este momento estoy enfrentando la prueba de fuego mas dificil.

On a typical day, I used to smoke almost two packs of cigarettes, meaning that any activity or moment alone had to be "celebrated" with a smoke. When I quit, I felt that need to reward myself with a cigarette. Luckily, these attacks were very brief, lasting only a couple of minutes, and then the urge to smoke disappeared. So, little by little, I've managed to forget about it less and less each day. Although right now I'm facing the toughest test yet..

Y el tema es que mi mama tambien fuma, es adicta desde su niñez y aunque fui una motivación para ella e intento tambien dejarlo, no lo logro… Es decir, he tenido a mi mama en casa por dos semanas viéndola fumar de lejos y sintiendo el aroma del cigarrillo nuevamente. Pero tranquilos, no me afecto demasiado y no he caído en la tentación a pesar de que mi mama me ha ofrecido (que mal de su parte por cierto) el primer día fue complicado pero ya solo ignoro que alguna vez amaba la nicotina.

The thing is, my mom also smokes. She's been addicted since childhood, and even though I was a motivation for her and she's trying to quit too, I can't... I mean, I've had my mom at home for two weeks now, watching her smoke from afar and smelling the cigarette again. But don't worry, it hasn't affected me too much, and I haven't given in to temptation, even though my mom has offered me some (which is awful of her, by the way). The first day was tough, but now I just ignore the fact that I once loved nicotine.

Los cambios que he notado en mi cuerpo no son demasiados, pero si llegan a hacer la diferencia, empezare comentando que ahora respiro mejor, no me ahogo por las noches mientras duermo y no toso todo el día. Ya no huelo horrible. Antes solía sentirme mal por mi propio olor ya que yo misma me sentía asqueada del olor a nicotina acumulada en mis manos, labios y cabello, pero la peor parte era cuando el olor se impregnaba en mi ropa, el olor de nicotina en la tela era terrible y desagradable. Ahora huelo muy bien y me anime a comprarme productos para la piel y el cabello con olores suaves y que me agraden, incluso me compre un perfume.

The changes I've noticed in my body aren't too many, but they do make a difference. I'll start by saying that I breathe better now; I don't get breathless at night while I sleep, and I don't cough all day.
I don't smell awful anymore. I used to feel bad about my own smell because I was disgusted by the nicotine odor that had built up on my hands, lips, and hair, but the worst part was when the smell permeated my clothes. The nicotine smell on fabric was terrible and unpleasant. Now I smell great, and I've even started buying skin and hair products with soft scents that I like. I even bought a perfume.

Un cambio no tan favorable es que he sentido mucha molestia en mi garganta como si tuviese moco atravesado y a cada rato tengo que raspar mi garganta con mi voz para sentir que la aclaro, incluso se me pone la voz super gruesa de la nada y no se porque pasa esto ya que me solía pasar mucho cuando fumaba demasiado. Es un poco incomodo la verdad.

One less positive change is that I've been experiencing a lot of discomfort in my throat, like I have mucus stuck there, and I constantly have to clear my throat with my voice to feel like I'm getting it out. My voice even gets really deep out of nowhere, and I don't know why this is happening since it used to happen a lot when I smoked too much. It's quite uncomfortable, to be honest.

Corazón banner (1).png

Espero JAMAS volver a consumir cigarrillos porque es un vicio sumamente autodestructivo y que realmente no tiene sentido, no aporta nada, solo te engaña haciéndote creer que te calma pero en silencio esta manipulando tu cerebro para consumir más y más, es una lástima que mi mama nunca pueda salir de ese circulo y espero que no traiga consecuencias muy graves mas adelante. Por ahora yo me siento bien de haberlo logrado y no solo por mí, sino por mi familia quien tambien estaban siendo afectados por el humo del maldito cigarrillo.

I hope I NEVER smoke cigarettes again because it's an extremely self-destructive vice that truly makes no sense. It offers nothing; it only deceives you into believing it calms you down, but silently it's manipulating your brain to consume more and more. It's a shame my mother can never break free from that cycle, and I hope it doesn't have serious consequences later on. For now, I feel good about having succeeded, not only for myself but also for my family, who were also being affected by the smoke from those damned cigarettes.